Kerren the girl

2009-08-30T00:00:00.001+08:00

She dont know who she is too..

2009-07-27T00:08:00.003+08:00

Just because You know I love you...

1.你可以沉默不语,不管我的着急,

　你可以不回信息,不顾我的焦虑,

　你可以将我的关心,说成让你烦躁的原因,

　你可以把我的思念,丢在角落不屑一顾,

　你可以对着其他人微笑, 对我爱理不理

　你可以给别人拥抱, 对我只留背影

　你可以对全世界好,

　却忘了我一直的伤心……

　你做什么都可以，

　不过是因为仗着我喜欢你，

　而那，

　却是唯一让我变得卑微的原因。

2. 有些事，一转身就是一辈子。

3. 年轻时我们放弃，以为那只是一段感情，后来才知道，那其实是一生。

4. 我还在原地等你，你却已经忘记曾来过这里。

5. 哀莫大于心不死。

6. 我很好，不吵不闹不炫耀，不要委屈不要嘲笑，也不需要别人知道。

7. 朋友们都羡慕我，其实羡慕他们的人是我。

8. 爱你，很久了，等你，也很久了，现在，我要离开你了，比很久很久还要久……

9. 我失恋了，你怎么可以把我弄丢了。

10. 那些被允许任性的年代，叫做青春……

11. 我在过马路，你人在哪里？

12. 忘却，是最无奈的爱。

13. 你的幸福路人皆知，我的狼狈无处遁形。

14. 如果我转过身，就不会有人看见我的眼泪了吧？

15. 我们经过那么多考验，最后还是回到了原点……

16. 让你在没有我的地方疯狂，让我在没有你的世界坚强。

17. 每一天，允许自己放纵一次，哭一次，只一次……其余的时间，就开开心心地笑着过。

18. 对自己狠心，才会让你幸福。

19. 我是好人，别伤害我。

20. 我是由影子保护的。

21. 我只想问你，若我回头，你还在不在？

22. 当你做对的时候，没有人会记得；当你做错的时候，连呼吸都是错。

23. 爱那么短，遗忘那么长……

24. 等待，是一生最初的苍老

25. 一个人只要不再想要，就什么都可以放下。

26. 童话已经结束，遗忘就是幸福。

27. 幸福，就是找一个温暖的人过一辈子。

28. 没有什么过不去，只是再也回不去。

29. 要有多坚强，才敢念念不忘。

30. 看着别人的故事，流着自己的眼泪。

31. 我喜欢现在的自己，我怀念过去的我们。

32. 不被理解的弱小只好一直坚强。

33. 不要骗我，你知道即使你的谎话我都会相信。

34. 我在怀念，你不再怀念的。

35. 请不要假装对我好，我很傻，会当真的。

36. 一个人，一座城，一生心疼。

37. 我们每一步,都走的太早了啊.在学会爱之前陷入,在学会体谅之前分手,在学会面对之前结束

38.我一生中最幸运的两件事: 一件，是时间终于将我对你的爱消耗殆尽 .一件，是很久很久以前一天，我遇见你……

39. 感情不是够付出够努力，就能留住幸福

40. 来年陌生的是昨日最亲的某某, 总好于那年没有遇见过某某

2009-07-17T00:08:00.004+08:00

Kerren is feeling so loved! =) There is this person who is always by her side when she needs someone to talk to.. with just a simple sms, she will always let Kerren knows when she is feeling down too..

For 2 years or more that Kerren is in Singapore, she never fail to be a good friend and indeed a great sister-like.

They both met in a dance class..and they got closer.. Both with the passion to dance, they joined other dance classes outside school.. and bcoz of that, they are meeting each other almost 5 days a week!! =) and now..she is known as Kerren's PengIu in the Dance Studio by one instructor! hehehe..

They are always seen to be together attending classes in the studio.. =) and they had lots of fun there eventho they knew noone else sometimes.. they are just glad that they have each other along..

Thanks Dear Lishan! <3>

We just need more time to shop, eat, manipedi, sing K and club together!!! =)

2009-05-31T00:12:00.002+08:00

I want to go home..

I need a break.. away from everything! Please dont haunt me again.. I had enough and Im tired..

To go or to stay, your choice..

Ur heart that i wanted.. Im letting go...

2009-05-13T01:31:00.004+08:00

Romance.. Love is just imperfect!

She called him up in the midnight..

the conversation went.. "Dear, I feel like going to the beach for a walk.. Do u want to accompany me?"

He never fail to accompany her to do what she wanted to.. Off they went to the beach.. walking along the sandy beach, one hand holding their slippers while the other holding each other's hand.. she can feel the cooling sea breeze blowing and the most important, she can feel the warmth of his presence..

He was the one who made her do alot of things that she did not imagine herself doing. For him, she wanted to improve herself every second she can.. She was deeply in love. They often fight over small stuffs but at the end of the day, he will knock on her door with a bunch of flowers! Just how sweet it was..

They fought, they loved.. but in the end.. they were not the right one for each other..

For the love that is shared.. for the tears and laughters that they went through.. from a stranger to a lovely one..and yet back to stranger again

Being loved and hurt before? Its way better than not experiencing it at all..

2009-05-10T10:28:00.003+08:00

Time to refocus!

Yes Kerren, please refocus on what u suppose to.. Not on those non-sense issues that let urself down.. Life is way toooo short as someone commented, Yes! it is way to short to waste time on such issues.. =)

The Sun shines once again, I shall forget bout all the troubles! ReFOCUS! i mean REFOCUS again!!

I've watched 'Taken' recently and I find that its a nice show =). Daddy is hero! So is mine! <3>

Planning ahead on what I should really achieve and focus on..

Been slacking a lot in my school works recently! Guess its time to get my mode back to UniLife! Other than that, Its time for me to really work on my DanceClub and StudentCouncil's stuffs.. And yes finally, I have decided to join perhaps, StudioWu or OSchool..

I am FAT! haha, need to work on this too... awwwww~

Pending stuffs,

Self-enrichment programmes or workshops

Photoshop

Guitar

Swimming

Its time to..Be back on track once again.....

2009-05-08T23:47:00.004+08:00

A lot to think.

She wants to talk to someone.. But she couldnt find the right one to listen to her.. She couldnt do anything.. She felt so helpless inside at times.. Who is there to share the pain? the troubles? All you know is just to laugh around and play around.. Do you realli care? Well, you dont have to..

She was having so much in her head alone today.. She felt like bursting into tears in the public.. She is trying her best to hold back.. 'Do you think they like her?' A very straight forward question, just like a sharp knife poking into her heart.. Thanks for reminding once again.. Its seriously stupid when she thought about it.. well, mostly to everyone.. She felt its all one-sided! Who cares if she is not around? She has so many friends, she wouldnt even mind if she is not with us.. But you did not know how much she went through just to try to be around with u all.. you dont know.. Yet, in return, she got all the scars that she never want to have or should she say..she never imagine having..

She is so sick of herself being sooo loving and caring..yet being hated back for that? If only she could spend some time on those that love her back, those that wanted so much to talk to her, to know her more and yet getting a cold shoulder from her..

'I am sorry..'

2009-05-08T00:14:00.002+08:00

You really think you know her?

She might seems like she has a lot of friends, but she is always trying to clear her days out for her best friends around her. But do they cherish? If you couldnt make it, they will simply think that you has too many friends to entertain so you actually didnt put them in ur heart. But they dont know how it hurts when you do care about them, do take time out for them..yet not being mentioned or even cherished in their heart..

She saw them playing so happily there.. Is it because its without her? Does life seems better when someone who is not suppose to be in that group are out of them? She tried her very best ways to be as close.. Yes! She is sorry that she has to much to fulfill outside.. But if you take her as a real friend, and if you really do love her.. You will understand..

She never understand this theory of understanding until she met this guy. He always seems to disappoint her.. in many ways.. Made her wait, Cancled appointments at the very last minute, He made her feel as if she is not being appreciated, He tend to feel that sleeping is more important than going out with her eventho she tried so hard to clear her time out for him.. She felt not appreciated..

But after sometimes, she tend to understand.. She does not get mad that easily when he cancle stuffs at the very last minute.. she does not feel disappointed so easily coz she always think that he has try his best.. I guess.. this happen when u reach the point that u realli take everything about that person. Even if its a -ve point, it appears as it is in ur heart..it does not keep u away from this friend..

It all came back..

Will you understand her too?

Are you sure you will still stand by her when things turn upside down?

She counld not believe but yes, she was facing that herself back in few months ago.. When she had a fight with a friend, no one stood by her.. All her close friends did not give her a hand to held her up.. I guess, they all stood by the opponent.. It was hurting.. very hurting even when she is thinkin bout it again now.. the person who stood by her were those that she didnt take them as important as she took this close group of friends.. Why did they show her love more than u guys do? and yet..She stood there..staring blankly into the sky asking myself.. Who are the true friends? Who are those that she can cry on..? She thought she knows you well, she thought she could share everything.. she thought she knew u longer and that u understand her.. but i guess...

You did not..

2009-05-04T01:35:00.001+08:00

Perhaps if you really know the real her.. You will hate her too..

2009-04-24T13:20:00.003+08:00

i hate it when you are so selfish..

but i hate it more when I still care about you..

Time to let go..

2009-04-09T21:38:00.002+08:00

There are so much inside me that Im not sure if i could bring them out in words.. I seriously felt so much love after the Vietnam trip.

It felt so weird now when u have all the loved ones reading what you typing now in a darn big screen.. but when the feeling is over whellming inside you, you wouldnt even bother whose looking at you.

I have a great day today with all the travelmates. Time to have a break and play some games while drinking..

More updates soon....

2009-04-07T00:02:00.002+08:00

Its been a long yet short 9 days away from INTERNET and SINGAPORE!

Have u guys been missing me?

I have been missing Vietnam badly..

missing my coolest and funniest travelmates..

missing all the great parents there..

missing all the fun we had travelling in da packed van..

missing all the joy singing together in da van..

missing the time we played uno every night..

missing all the lame jokes that we were trying to make..

There are too much to be missed and yet i will keep all of my deep inside my heart. I could never thought this trip will turn out this fun. At first i was pretty sure we wont be enjoying much since Im gonna travel with 2 "difficult" people.. Haha *u know who u r* but.. things really turned out the other way.. it was great that we r travelling together! we had soo much fun!

Day 1:

Got to Saigon (HoChiMin) and was pretty shocked to see soooooo many motorcycles on da street.. haha Sorry la.. Brunei no motorbike bah =) hahaha.. and trust me..u will be bugged by the horning sound of the vehicle that u r travelling in. and its just sooo congested and i guess polluted too! haha~ We had our lunch then coffee in a nice modern coffee shop where they played TECHNO music even if its 1pm! lol~ hahaha.. it was something different from Singapore. but still people are enjoying their coffee listening to Techno! XD

Walked around the city and went for Dinner Buffet with Ryan's family. They are great people!

Day 2:

We went to WarField. Yes! Thats the place where you can get into the tunnel and people said if u r too fat..u cant go through coz its made for small size vietnamese only! I was pretty afraid that i cant get in too..haha but luckily they made an american size tunnel just for tourist! hahaha~ it was 100m of crawling and we thought we could make it till the end but we were too lousy. We stopped after 30m. Felt like dying in da tunnel. haha.. Stuffy and CRAWLING is a disaster! haha..

It was a long journey there tho. Took us like 2hours van-ride? and yet Ryan's parents went by bikes! omg! hahaha..powerful la~

In da evening we took a 6hrs train from Saigon to NgaThrang! and this was the exciting part..coz I HAVE NEVER RIDE ON TRAIN BEFORE! if only you consider the train in JerudongPark (themepark in Brunei) or the one in GentingHighland (malaysia) as Train! hahahaha XD

It wasnt as bad as i thought. It looks highclass.. hehe and the bed was comfy too! =) We played

games in da train and it was really fun. Until some auntie came over and tell us to lower down our volume! hahaha =) but trust me..the food on da train SUCKS! ahahaha..

wonder whats chicken rice soup means? Its chicken porridge! lol~

Day3 :

Arrived NgaThrang at 6am in da morning. And we had a goodsleep on da train! NgaThrang..Less traffics.. Nice beach.. Blue Sky! =) a relaxing place indeed..

Went for breakfast then head to the Waterfall. We had fun there eventho the scene wasnt really that nice and we didnt actually go up to the highest point. Due to hot weather and laziness. All we want was to soak ourselves in da cold water! so we decided to stop somewhere where no one else is there. We played and laughed out loud! haha..realy loud!! hahaha and guess wad? i fell when crossing the stream. and yes.. bruises! =( and so i decided i must loose weight! ewww...

Enjoyed a minority cultural show and walked all the way to watch pig race! haha. it was fun when u get to bet on which pig will win..and guess wad? my pig won!! haha and so i got myself a lucky pig token as prize which the man say it will bring me good luck and wishes will come true..therefore i shouted ' i want a boyfriend' hahahaha!!

After that we went to the beach to fly kite. Ok, again! its my first time flying kite! hahaa.. never see soo many kites in da sky before XD eww.. i wonder whats my childhood memories ah? hahaha! and..i dropped my lucky pig token and its broken =( i felt sad.. is dat a sign saying i wont get a bf? sigh~

Met up with Cardin's parents in da evening for dinner and we had great seafood feast which cost his dad about 200plus sgd? ouch! his dad is just so lovely to all of us.. Thanks =) and yes, i was told that i should stay in NgaTrang to be trained as a good daughter in law! wakakkaka~

Day 4:

Here we go!! Half day tour to 3 or 4 islands..i forgotten! hahha~ it was raining in da morning and we thought we might not have fun. But when we were on our way..the rain stopped and our smiles show when the sun shone brightly in da sky. We took the 'no.4 boat' tour! hahaha.. and the people on board was hillarious and friendly lar! haha.. its my first time jumping into the sea with a floating ring.. i was damn scared la..coz i dont know how to swim and im fat which means might drown easily!! but i had so much fun eventho at first i had pretty hard time struggling in da water.. haha.. snorkelling is a great experience to me eventho the corals wasnt as good as i thought. haha! i just had fun in da water. and the staff actually scared me by saying that there is a jelly fish behind me..wakakka~ i was super scared at that point of time thinkign that i might not be able to come back to singapore again *touchwood*

Then we had a small happyhour party on the boat in da middle of no way. hahaha! Rien was the first being forced to sing Korean song..and next..its me..eww! i can still remember hearing someone shouting "yes! tat girl..tat girl..she sing very well..bring her up and let her sing' *pointing at CARDIN! thanks very much har!!!!* but well..i enjoyed it.. hehe.. Sang 2 songs. One singing alone. and the other one i had MiuMiu(Cardin's cousin) singing with me..

After that we had a floating bar on da sea. Where one of the staff with a big tyre-ring on da sea with many bottles of redwine with him. and all of us floating around him drinking the redwine! haha.. we had so much fun and yes.. i was DRUNK!!! seriously DRUNK!! =) been forced to drink soo much and i have never felt like that before.. hahaha~ perhaps i had too much of redwine plus the boat is abit shaky due to the waves..

After da trip..we were all tanned!! yes!! TANNED AND RED!! hahaha.. had dinner with Cardin's relatives in da evening and they are all friendly people =) lovely indeed!

Day 5 :

We were suppose to go for a BAY TOUR..but we cancled coz the weather doesnt seems to be allowing us to.. plus we had too much of WATEROUTINGS! haha..kinda sick of wearing the swimsuit. So we decided to go around nice places in NgaThrang. We went Church, temple..and MUD BATHE! hahahaha..it was fun.. eventho its raining but still we enjoyed it.. =)

We went cycling in da evening. Around the busy city.. I never thought i had chance to do such things. Coz i have never cycled in da road before and yet i cycled in Vietnam where the traffic was more terrible than in Brunei! haha..but luckily NgaTrang wasnt as busy as in Saigon! =) we cycled for 3hours and stopped for dinner when its raining then continue cycled again. Then we had coffee with Cardin's family again =). Trust me. Vietnam's coffee is good.. and NgaTrang's is the best!! hahaha

Cycled back to hotel in which half way..my bicycle's type puncture! wakakkaa.. so i hav to run back to hotel holding my bicycle and others cycling around me..wakakakka.. Went to Cardin's house and yes! its 12am where the street is empty so Cardin allowed me to try his motorcycle!haahaha..i was having fun with it.. never ever thought i can ride one!! cardin was sitting behind me..then when its near his house i accidentally accelerated..ahahaha luckily Cardin hold on to me and stopped me right away. or else..omg! i dunno whether I can be back in SG in ONE PIECE or not!! hahahah XD

Uno in da evening again! hahaha~

Day 6:

Took a flight to Da Nang. Met up with tour guide. Went to visit a few ancient places and settled down in a small town called Hoi An! It was pretty different from how the city looks like. Its more of under developing? hmm.. ancient shop houses side by side. and we walked around the street. We tried da duck egg where inside its a duck.. *ee..i dunno how to explain..haha* it wasnt as bad as thought. Luckily no feather..or else.. *yucks*

Day 7:

Went to Hue. Also an ancient city.. Went to the ancient palace. It was HUGE!! hahaha.. took alot of pics there.. then we had this king meal at night where we were all dressed up in what was thought as king's, queen's, princess's, princes' and gonggong's look! hahahaha XD it was fun!! and the food was great too..

After the meal, we went for Sidlow? dunno how to spell..hahaa.. Trishaw ride around the city! heheh it was fun and the wind was very cooling!! i was freezing coz wearing sleeveless!! XD hahaha..

Day 8:

Back to Saigon! and ouch..we all feel sad.. coz its the last day we spend in Vietnam. We went around shopping for souveniors! and was touched coz Ryan's parents and bro were with us shopping around.. and Cardin's mom was with us from NgaTrang to Hoian back to Saigon too! ouch..they are all very great people. they prepared fruits for us. Take good care of us! and pay for our meals. We all felt the loved ..eventhough its just a week..but it meant so much to us! we were being treated so nicely eventho we r just strangers to them! ouch.. i can feel the tickle in my heart deep inside..

During the journey to the restaurant after shopping. In the taxi, i look out of the window.. seeing all the familiar scenes, motorcycles all around me which appear me to new to me one week before. And im leaving this place tomorrow.. Its too fast. i felt as if i just came to Vietnam yesterday and now im leaving.. I was complaining about the congested street and now i am missing them. The song playing in da taxi's radio was a slow, sentimental song in vietnamese. eventho i duno the meaning but its as if its played to say goodbye. I felt like crying and so i kept looking outside the window.. trying to hide tears. I told myself..its the last day and lets not spoil the mood.

In da restaurant, we had vietnamese fish steampot. It was great! and we had some words for their parents. Had Ryan and Cardin translated for us.. how i wish time can just freeze now..

Day 9:
Went for breakfast with Cardin's mum and Ryan's parents. Then went for coffee. It was a great place and with great people! =) and time is running short.. we are leaving..yes we do have to accept the fact that we r leaving.. sent Cardin's mum off first and omg.. she was crying when she left. I couldnt hold back..i cried too.. but managed to control after a while.. separation is always the most toturing part..

In the airport, Ryan's parents and bro sent us off. I was really glad to have met them. I had such sweet memories during this trip. its all from every single one of them! =) hugs! Promise we will be back in Vietnam again. Vietnam part 2!!

Reached Singapore.. Got home in our separate way. Once reached home..we all felt bad..

all of us texted each other. saying how much fun we all had.. how we missed each other..

Woke up the next morning.. felt so empty..so lonely.. no plans noone around..no noise..

Again texted each other telling how much we have missed each other..

Im glad we will meet again on Thursday! i cant wait for it.. just wanna be together again..

2009-03-27T23:56:00.002+08:00

he is still being loved. But is she being love back too? =)

Yeappiee!! Im heading to Vietnam tomorrow.. going for 8days! Will update once im back~ and Brunei! i MISS!!!! =)

Heading to bed now.. Muacks people!

2009-03-22T17:06:00.002+08:00

Kerren Fong Siew Lin took the quiz "How is your life?" and the result is

Your life is based on wanting to experience love or loving someone. You live to love and love to live. You have your worst of times and you have your best.. you sit and wait for that someone to complete you..

2009-03-22T10:29:00.007+08:00

Thanks to Wansing, I took the 'does he love you' quiz..and the answer is..

"He Kinda Likes You."
Just dont rush things. You never know he could change his mind about you.

So now, I am really letting things be the way it wants to be.. coz i sometimes think its just a crush not a love.. whether is it love or is it crush. It doesnt matter now! =) coz Kerren is busy with lots and lots of stuffs!! Dun wanna think about it..

Had my last paper on da 19th, and i was slacking the whole day of 20th and 21st! OMG!! Its time to mugz now.. dont wanna regret when i get into the exams room so gotta rush things now.. Facebook is the main cause! wakakaka..Facebook addicts!!

Cheers people! Muacks!

2009-03-18T11:52:00.011+08:00

For a moment, she stops and think..

Is this LOVE? Is this the Love that she has been looking for? Or is it just a crush? anyone out there please help define CRUSH?

There are always things that are better left unsaid.. I know the answer..

2009-03-17T23:13:00.001+08:00

BestFriends.

2009-03-14T09:38:00.008+08:00

Once again, Kerren is back to the happy happy smiley face girl! =)

Yes, i was too sensitive at times.. I know you care =) Thanks for always being there trusting her.. You guys made the difference in her.. You guys showed her that this world is actually colourful! Love always..

Dreamt of home yesterday.. i pretty miss everyone back there.. Feel like going back even if its only a week.. just wanna spend sometime with everyone..and with my family too!

Exams are just around the corner.. 10more days to suffer then i will be free! Seriously, i was slacking this term..dunno why.. I couldnt really feel the nerves yet.. Perhaps i will be crying posting after getting my results *cross-finger this dont happen* Guess Im pretty sure of myself where i stand. .and i know it wont be that bad.. but perhaps i seriously shall put in more effort for the next term.. Never regret things that had already been done.. =)

Forgotten if i have mention this in my previous posts, I actually went for a school trip.. just a 2D1N trip to Desaru (which is somewhere in JB). It was a short yet fun trip! Guess its the companies that Im with.. all fun people! =) and all.. BIG EATERS! hahaha

Hope thats not the end of the fun we will be having =) I love travelling.. and i guess you have to be with the right person too.. lets all have fun together.. Bah Nek, Im gonna go ur place tu! hahaha.. free accomodation? Tapi airticket expensive lar.. Miss those fun times we had (Nek,Za and Vi) hearts u all lots!

Next Destination: Vietnam (28th March - 5th April)

Adios..

2009-03-13T10:53:00.006+08:00

Here comes the Pics that i promise...

A pic of us during the dance competition =)

A pic of us during the dance practice =) *Juz d six +1* hehehe

The Kerren with her Ex-Yet-Not-Much-Difference-Haircut~ hahaha =) but well i love it since it looks a lot healthier now ^^

2009-03-10T23:38:00.002+08:00

randomness.. i just feel like blogging..

Feeling abit sucks now..Not concentrating in my books..and dont feel like listening to anyone talking to me right now.. Can people pls..give me a few hours for myself..

Trying to run out of the box... just please leave me alone for some time.. guess now is the best time for me to get to bed.. gotta chill myself for a while..

Been thinking all those stupid unneccessary things..and yes, with no conclusion as usual! stupid har? but thats just what life is about..

I really envy those close friends who really are close friends.. i dunno if u know what i mean. .but at times i just feel abit *unreal* of certain people.. they tend to be sooo close.. yettttt sooooo FAR!! As if its just faking a smile infront of me and at my back, hate me for being there.. Poeple, if that is so.. im sorry if i bothered u.. you can kindly tell me or perhaps start hinting me so that i will walk away and not pretending as if we r sooo close and yet u kinda dislike me from behind..I dunno is it me myself bringing illusions or is that im sensing the right thing.. why do this to me? I really thought we are close..until at times i felt perhaps u just think me as annoying.. Im sorry coz i know im just way too kepoh at times to pop up and act as if u really wanna go out with me..

Singapore, where i really has no one to turn to.. i mean i cant really trust that he/she will 100% be there for me.. Away from my best buddies in Brunei..my closest family in Brunei.. I just felt so alone at times.. who ever know this? a smile can fake everything.. add some warmth in the smile and all people think is that.."wow, kerren is just a happy go lucky girl"

Enough of emo-ing..and thanks Chieh for talking to me..

I had a feeling now...
that i wanna leave this place..

2009-03-05T08:04:00.002+08:00

People! I CUT MY HAIR!! hahaha.. but well it seems nothing much difference.. wait till u see me ba =) let u judge.. but i love my new hair..Thanks to my hair stylist, Chris! =)

Exams time is getting nearer and nearer..and guess what? as usual, i havent start studying yet.. eww! Last 2 weeks i was busy with dance, last week i was busy hanging out with friends.. this week..omg!! busy giving out flyers! (which is a sucks job!) hahaha... and im going to Desaru this weekend! Yeayness! I cant wait to go there relax lor.. been telling myself i must start revising soon, but i just dunno y the mood is gone.. =(

Oh yeah, will be in school the whole day today for Student council's event..which is blood donation drive! Feeling a lil excited coz i have never donated blood b4..hehe will post up some great pics after the events.. =) hope i dun donate OILY bloods.. hehehhe

2009-02-25T11:03:00.002+08:00

Gosh..Three more weeks to my Exams! and yes! Im so not prepared yet! Sitting here whole day starring at the laptop.. Wonder whats wrong with me? lazybugs inside me..i need more of bookworms instead!

Am missing my family (Daddy and korkor and sausau)..am also missing my BFFs in Brunei! Arh.. Missing all those fun stuffs we been through =) Sweet Sweet Memories indeed!

Last week was a freaking tiring week for me, well perhaps i should say for all my dancebabes too! We had been practising everyday for the competition..but too bad, we just didnt get in..well, never give up is the spirit that we shud have! so yea! =) There are just more better dancers out there and i sincerely wish that i will be one in the future.. Thanks to all the dance babes that struggle through this together.. Linda- Hugs babe! Thanks for everything! Shanshan- We were tired, but i guess we enjoyed the time together! Jess- Whenever im tired, i felt happy when i see you BLUSH!! hehehe.. Irene- My laopo!! haha! cant stop laughing when i see u wearing my pants! Cindy- Thanks for joining us! There are more comps to come!! and last but not least, BRIAN! Hey, Thanks for being there with us throughout! and the concerned call at 12am! haha.. =) we all had fun together! *flowers, flowers, flowers!*

2009-01-30T01:58:00.005+08:00

Here come some photos that i editted this afternoon =) Its for my dearest cousin who got married last year..

Time to get some sleep now..someone la kept chatting with me..u know who u are! u! haha... XD

2009-01-15T22:40:00.003+08:00

Forgive me for the emo posts.. People do not worry about me k? I just need a place to express myself.. =) I will talk it out if i feel like it so please dont bother to worry bout me k? Im always fine.. hehe..

Orite, here come the pic of my healthy meal today!! =) Had class in Dhoby Gaut then met up with Michael Oppa for lunch..we had soupspoon! Very healthy! yeayness! haha.. then i went gym and he went to class.. We then met again after his class and went for dinner this time..Guess what we had? Yeong Tau Fu! yeaness!! healthy.. haha.. lol but guess wat? i had Yogurt after dinner..arhh...wonder is it fat-free or not.. lol!

Back to the normal Kerren please...

2009-01-15T22:28:00.002+08:00

At times i really feel like a loser.. Yes! Here i am again, emo-ing.. lalala~

I dont know why..I have been putting in so much.. just to care but I think i overdid it..thats y people is turning their back to me..well, kerren who the hell are u to shout at me like this? yes! u r right..

Dont ask why recently i dont talk much.. dont ask y i didnt bother to ask anymore..coz u know it better than me.. I ask, I talk..then end up, U r afraid of telling me the truth coz u knew i wud be angry.. OK, Im sorry and im really sad to know that im such a short-tempered person in the heart of you all.. Im sorry.. this always remind me to those time back in Brunei..maybe perhaps u all back in Brunei also kinda afraid of me coz i always scold people like mad cow.. Im sorry..it just sound as if im really not an understanding friend.. Im just..arh.. LOSER!!

Im sorry..I didnt mean to be so emo..okie..sorry..I just need a place to release myself..whether you do read or you dont.. Im just telling you that perhaps I shouldnt love that much coz it made u feel as if you cant breath..Im sorry for ever making u feel so.. At times, i really wanna know..really wanna ask.. hoping you would tell me..but u didnt..so im not sure whether shud i ask..it just sound as if i wanna control watever u r doing but i aint mean to be that way..i just care so i wanna know.. but now then i lost all the feelings.. i cant feel anymore.. i dunno..

I felt so alone at times.. yes, there r people around me that always love me..But when im really down, i just couldnt thought of someone who i called and there he/she stand infront of me to accompany me throughout.. A person that hardly say No eventho I ask for a very stupid favour.. A person that i know even if he/she is busy, will make time for me... Okie im sorry, i know im being too demanding.. Its just the love that Im hoping for..to just love me back coz u know if u need me im sure i will be there...

Just a girl who always smile..but who knows the pain?

2009-01-13T22:24:00.002+08:00

Heya blog..

Was so surprised to receive a call around 12am this morning.. I was kinda pissed thinking who will that be trying to prank call me eh? haha lol.. and to my surprise its someone very special.. I was really touched when I heard his voice from the other end of the phone..

"Siew Lin, are you ok? I have been reading ur blog and sensed that perhaps u r not feeling ok now? are you alright?" He asked..

I was really touched.. I felt tears in my eyes.. I never thought he would read my blog, well afterall I didnt really tell him that i did update my blog recently..

He is there..He always is.. to love and care about me.. Thanks SouWei! I am really blessed to have this group of bestfrends in Brunei..all of them are so sweet to me.. Yes! u too! Michelle Teo!! I know u are reading!! hehe..Thanks dearie.. I saw u writting that u would wanna see me right now..Thanks girl..I will be strong bcoz i dun wanna let u all down..i dun wanna make u all worry bout me.. and not forgetting my best sista,Joyce! Still remember that day i sms her bout my problem and she replied "I really wanna fly to ur place now to accompany you!" Ah..I am really blessed to have u all around me.. Thanks! a million thanks..

And VIVI!! I didnt know u will follow up too..coz i thought perhaps no one will continue to view my page since my previous blog was like a century ago..Thanks dearie! and all those that care and read..Thanks..

Like what people always said.. We, human, usually takes people around us for granted.. I seriously never thought of u guys to be so sweet to me..afterall we are seperated by a SEA..and I didnt see myself giving out so much..but i have been receiving more than expected! Now i know the feeling of being loved! Thanks.. Im always so blind to just notice those who might not even bother to love back and i missed out those who are usually there to love and support me.. Thanks!! words can never express my feeling inside now..

I thank god for bringing so many great people around me..and yes my family too..All are being so understanding..

Wei, I really had a nice chat with you on the phone yesterday.. It aint very long, only bout 30mins but i can truly feel the strong bonds between the all of us.. and yes, I was so glad to have met up with Kai and Hao when they were here in Singapore too.. =)

I dont know why, but yesterday i was reading the blog back in 2007..The day that i blogged when i was first in Singapore.. I remember myself saying that i really miss this 2 guys who used to be so close with me..and yes! Time does help..we are back together again..Thanks.. Its only when we fall, when we lose something that we realise the importance of its presence! Now then i will never ever take u guys for granted.. for u all that love me the way i can never thought of.. Thanks! =) I am always blessed to have u all around.. and thanks for constantly reminding me that u all will be there whenever i need someone..

I was being so selfish..I just loved those who i think i should love and i really didnt realise them there being so caring and thoughtful of me.. I thought distance hav brought us apart but silly me.. its only me thinking so.. The rest still love the way they always did.. so here i am.. I LOVE YOU GUYS! Thanks for cheering my days.. Maybe, i wil be shy to tell u guys face to face.. but trust me..I really do cherish your presence..im sorry for my silly-ness from the past..

The guardian angles that are around you..cherish them!

2009-01-10T23:52:00.003+08:00

I dunno..i thought i could hold back and not talked that much but there you go..Lectures!Lectures! and Lectures (well at least i did try my best even if its being taken as rubbish talks)

Kerren, are you really a good friend? or just someone who loves to lecture people trying to make people the way u want to be? arhh.. I really dont know.. I talk because I care and concern..I didnt know I would react in such a way just now, I really thought i could just be cool about it..but perhaps maybe the replied that i got back triggered my angers.. How could you just treat it like a joke laughing all the way while I was trying to be serious.. I felt so much like a fool.. An unappreciated friend..

Someone told me, perhaps Kerren..You should just take it easy..Why do u have to act like that? Go with the soft talks..the slow and steady pace maybe this way would help..but I really dont think so..(well, ok..it makes me think again..Who am I to talk like this..) Maybe I was using the wrong approach from the beginning? I dont know..am i saying such things to just hurt that person? All I wish for a reply is guiltiness..Guilty means you know you are wrong and you need help to improve it..but you didnt..you flashed me a casual smile..and a few laughters which made me feel like idiot..

I am afraid..maybe true..one day..I will just let go..not gonna talk that much anymore..afterall who am I to you? I dont even know..

The girl who sacrifice..
The girl who felt is being taken for granted..
The girl who is always trying to do small things to make people happy..
The girl who just dont know who she is to you..

Sorry for all the annoyingness.. I just wanna let it out..

But trust me..I still love you the way you are..I am just trying my best to help eventho it will make you hate me..If i have a chance to let you improve youself to be a better person in the future..I dont mind scratching off my own image in your heart...

I do wish..

2009-01-10T19:23:00.003+08:00

She needed someone there..but she doesnt wanna rush.. she wants the right one..yeah at least the one she loves =)

Oritee back to the bloggie, aint u guys gald dat i blog today isnt bcoz im sad..haha~ I was such an emo girl or shud i say i still am.. In just a blink of an eye, its been 1years and 9months in Singapore? wow~ and im coming 20 this July..ouch!!

Throughout the days that Im here in Singapore, I felt trully blessed by everyone around me.. I have met tonnes of great people and back in Brunei, my strong bond with my soulmates and great friends can still be felt. And all this, i have to thanks Daddy for giving me this chance to study abroad.. Here, i learnt to be independent (which apparently aint so true coz I still have great elders around me who hold my hands and guide me through), I learnt to make my own decisions (yeah, 60% of them arent good ones hehe.. XD, people make mistake ok?) I learnt to cherish people around me, treasure their presences and love them more (YES! i DO!)

For this coming-2-year period here, I have gone through sorrows, pains but mostly laughters and happiness! =) Whose life will be complete if its between all those laughters and tears right? Its only when u fall that u will tend to tell urself to be more brave to face the future..Its only when u fall that u know u shall learn from mistakes..Its only when you fall that you realise how the people around you actually give you a hand and hold you up..

The bads, the goods..Its not up to us to judge.. Everyone has their own thinking that we cant possibly change but well if its for their good, at least we did try to make things change which will or will not be taken into consideration.. All the advices, ~~all the high pitch screaming (sounds weird but yeah..hahah)~~ its not because we have nothing else better to do..Its all because we love, we care thats why we bother to ask for changes. But well, afterall accept the person for who she/he is but not for who she/he is not. Trying to make them change to suit urself aint so nice, but if its trying to make them change for the benefits of themselves, i certainly agree!! *ehem, especially those who like to sleep 16hrs a day..yes, u honey..u! ~~oppps~~

I suddenly feel, when a person grows older..she/he tends to forgive people more easily..perhaps they finally realise their is no point keeping so much of angers and hatrets within oneself when you cant even be sure that you will survive tomorrow.

Always..
The person who scold is the person who loves u..
The person who cry along is the person who cant stand to see you crying..
The person who wants to be there is the person who cares..

and i know..
The person who reads this for sure LOVES me!! =) Muacks!

2009-01-09T19:54:00.010+08:00

~~The one who used to be there~~

Why did she let go? why did she not cherish? It was totally a lie if she said he wasnt sweet enough for her. He definetely was! But she chose to let go.. Perhaps she thought this is a better choice for him and yes it certainly is.. Seeing how happy he is now reminds her of the days they were together..How sweet he was to greet her in every occasions and not forgetting a present for her brithdays and valentine's days.. It was for 3years or more that he did so. She felt touched, and yes just touched..She had been askin herself..Is he really not the right one..and finally she decided to let go..It was her being so selfish that she didnt realise he was suffering..

The memories suddenly run through her mind..it was a sweet one afterall =) and it is really good to see him happier than ever before now..Its time to scratch the memories and move on, just like how he did.. Perhaps a brighter future is awaiting for her..

Best wishes goes to him

2009-01-09T19:35:00.002+08:00

Alrite..can never expect that my first post for 2009 is such an emo note..hehe =) Life moves on..Nothing much can be done to turn back times but to look forward to the better future..

As usual..the very first post of a new year should be our new year's resolutions right? yeehaa..here come mind..u ready? XD If really i could..i will work hard to achieve all the goals listed below..No Pain, No Gain!

[1] 65kgs during my 20th birthday(now then u notice im heavy! yes really am)
[2] Better score for my Degree terms (yes,need to be more hardworking!)
[3] HIM? (lalala,yea i know he will come when its time..ok i wait!)
[4] Spend more time with Daddy and family
[5] Travel to atleast 3 places?(too much eh? ahaha)
[6] Be able to take and edit better Photos

Last but not least...

TO BE A BETTER PERSON! Hooray!

If you know her..

2009-01-09T19:32:00.001+08:00

Afterall she aint that strong and brave..
She thought she could overcome it and hold back the tears..
But she couldnt..

She cant control herself..
She broke into tears..
The girl that always fill with laughters..
Now her eyes fill with sorrow..

In life, we have to learn to be strong..
But at times..when you just couldnt take it anymore..
You need a break..

She finally realised what reality is all about..
Its not as easy as she thought..
Its not as supportive as she thought..
Its just not as optimistic as she always thought..

When things turned upside down..
Do you really think you will stand by her?
Afterall she is just a normal girl ~~who always do things more but get back less..~~

The sacrifice who knows?

2008-10-16T00:02:00.002+08:00

been pushing myself too much.. been working on so many stuffs..am physically and mentally break down.. i need a break..but i dun wanna waste a second..so there has no break..

where does the smile goes too? i dont know..

had a less than 30minutes conversation with someone that cares me.. and i was touched to know that im loved! so much love...

"You shouldnt be so kind to them.. what if one day they leave? then u will be very sad"

and the response goes like this.."If its Kerren thats leaving.. i think i will be more than just sad" just how much this sentence mean to me.. i know im being loved and thats y im being treated differently.. Thanks so much.. <3

at times when im emotionally break down, there r just people around me that lighten up my life.. they show their love and their care.. somehow u will feel the love from people not so close to you when u were feeling very down..they just appear out of no where..so give u a hand..to held u up.. where true friendship shines..

There is this person that never give up on me.. always there shouting.. "Kerren! u can do it.. go ahead.. dont give up now.. until the last whistle..you will be wasting all ur time if u give up now.. almost there.. almost there.. " I thank him.. for being there.. eventho it might sounds very irritating at times..but still his presence makes a difference.. Thanks!

2008-10-13T20:53:00.002+08:00

Hmm..life is up and down as usual..but recently..i have learned so much about life..about friends..and about me myself..

Im feeling emotionally, mentally and physically break down now.. what have happened to Kerren? arh..where is the happy-go-lucky girl? I dunno.. sounds so emo recently..and i do look emo recently..there is always a sign of sorrowness in my eyes even if im smilling.. who can be there to light up my life?

Too many stuffs happening..sad and happy..orite, i will start off with sad ones 1st.. there is just people who always fail to love me back.. seems like they r always taking me for granted..and so i will learn to walk away now..perhaps they just love how life is even if its without me.. if one day..i ever leave the place..leave the people..leave the world..would u even miss my presence? a love that is not revealed.. a love that has no answer.. a love that is only one-sided...

Everytime when im feeling down, there r still people around me that try so hard to cheer me up..try so hard just to make me smile..and never fail to show their care..i thank them for the presence.. i do appreciate.. i do love back.. <3 and family too.. papa and koko being so caring and understanding..i love them so much.. they are always there even if i do something wrong, they wont scold me..they will tend to understand the situations and stand by me.. =) love them alot..

love is all around if u notice.. just try to look at those love u..dun pull ur days down just bcoz of those that doesnt deserve ur smile.. u can do it kerren..go kerren!

2008-08-04T00:03:00.002+08:00

I've been planning and dreaming on where i will go when i get a DSLR..and yeah, its gonna be the time where i will capture down the journey of my life.. the path leading me to the best ever future i can have..and throughout the whole process, i wanna make sure dat i have all of them captured.. through the lcd screen, through the small viewer..i see the bright smile on everyone's face, the colour of the sky and the surrounding..

Its ability helps to freeze everything for a second.. where the whole memories stop in dat time as if the clock does not go ticking again.. the smile that is plastered on everyone's face.. the joy, the tears..

every piece of photo is a piece of art with memories.. all different kinds of stories lie behind a piece of art.. only the person in the photo and the cameraman knows.. but with it developed and explained with captions.. the joy, happinness and sorrowness can be brought to the readers too.. with the help of palettes of colours and how the colours are blended together.. feelings can be brought out even if u dunno the exact story behind the piece of art.. the gesture, the colour.. the combination tells it all..

I hope one day..i will make u feel the same way i do..

if im given the chance to just stop the time from ticking for a second..it will be through my next toy.. =) 30 more days to go...

2008-08-03T23:52:00.003+08:00

who even bother reading? i wonder..

but no one can stop me from letting my inner me talking here.. the only place where my inner heart can talk freely.. no not 100% uncovered.. some still hidden deep inside..

some words are better left unsaid..

When browsing through my friends list in Msn,i came across this interesting personal messages.. it says " when we wake up from our sleep, we have 2 choices.. we can go back to sleep and dream or wake up and chase the dream"

im over caring sumtimes i guess..which makes me sound annoying.. please tell me dat i aint, so i wont stop my self from loving u.. at times i know i shud just slower down my pace.. i will wait for u, no matter how far u have gone away from me.. i will stand right here, the place where we used to be.. i will wait till the day when u realize, i was once the girl that brighten up ur life..

and yes, u r the next person dat i will bring my colour paint into ur life.. =) hoping that we can paint as much great and colourful memories as possible together..

2008-08-03T23:36:00.002+08:00

Money not enough 2 reminds me so much bout family love..

seriously..a nice movie to watch.. it reflects how singaporean thinks and reacts..somehow so true..and the song is very touching.. Jack Neo is indeed a great director.. if u understand hokkien, do click on the 1st song in my playlist..listens to the lyrics..i love this song so much now..

if im given the chance to talk to my mum again, i would wanna tell her that i love her eventhough i dont have much memories about her.. the mum that brought me to this world,the mum that raised me up.. no matter who u r, I am who i am now because of u.. without any of u, i wont be able to live such a happy life now.. Mummy, i love you!

Upon watching the movie, i felt really pain inside.. those with their mums around them, u din notice how lucky u r to hav mum..and y did u not treasure and cherish them.. im sure a lot of people out there whose mum had past away, whose mum is in a critical state in the hospital, whose mum is fighting the sickness..has been wanting to spend more time with their mums..even if its onli one second more..

Im among one of those who never really feel the warmth of mother..how much i wanna feel that..but i really love my dad..he is my hero.. he has been acting as a mummy and a daddy.. and i cant imagine how he fight the sorrow for the first few years when my mummy past away.. daddy, im glad that u r strong enough to overcome that.. because of u.. i live a great life now..I LOVE U,Pa! im afraid u cannot really feel my love.. but i have tried my best to show it.. and yes..i treasure every second we are together.. =) the best daddy award goes to Mr.Fong!! hehehe.. he is my great daddy and my best best friend..

I smile so much now because i have daddy in my heart.. <3

2008-08-03T22:56:00.002+08:00

i've been longing to post but i dunno why whenever i open the posting page, i cant think of anything to write..too much to be written, i aint lazy.. i wanna have everything written down here.. its a joy reading back the previous posts.. its as if everything just happened yesterday..

i had a great day on my birhtday..special thanks to all my housemates and Aunt Melia for the pre-birthday celebration, to all my lovely buddies for the countdown (Uyen,Rien,Melvyn,Cardin and Ryan) u guys had been so great to me, staying till my bday over..thanks alot!, to everyone that greeted me..thanks.. im blessed by u all.. and super special thanks to my lovely daddy, "Pa,I love u" if onli u read dis..without any doubt,u're the best daddy ever..i love u!

I've been having surprises and disappointments all coming together..im confused somtimes..its really difficult not to expect..but i hate expecting coz nothing turns out to be the way i expected.. not even close to how i wan it to be..i aint asking for much..just need a little of ur attention.. those i think i know, those that i think i love, those that i think i care..doesnt seems to think the way i think.. i dun blame u.. but myself for being so insane, thinking that you're worth it..but i just cant control..i just wanna do wad my mind and heart tell me to do..and dats y im doing so..i've always been there..keeping track to wat u r up to..but u never know..im fear of letting go.. but i know only with that will u be able to fly higher..let it go kerren.. let it fly to where it wanna be..

just like flying a kite.. i will rather let it fly up high..

im just so weird.. i feel myself being good to those dat doesnt seems to care..and being mean to those dat i know loves me.. maybe human are like that..they doesnt seems to appreciate those they have around them..they would rather spend time winning the heart of the strangers..

i understand..the way we r..can no longer be the way we used to be..

2008-07-23T23:51:00.000+08:00

i..duno wad to say..

birthday party was great.. wishes..i hope they come true..

2008-06-25T10:44:00.002+08:00

less than a month to my birthday.. yeayness!! XD

Thanks for all those that concern..i love u all..lots lots! XD u know ur presence brighten up my life..

cant wait till my exams is over..but arh..wad am i gona do in SG alone? ee..all da clasmates are heading back to their own countries.. =( im scared.. scared dat i wil be alone.. but i hope i wont..i stil hav my babes.. and a few more great frens.. but make sure u all date me out k? i dun wanna root at home! haha..

Wishlist..to da love ones:
-i want everyone around me to be blessed..and to be happy always
-i love papa and koko! i love family.. dey might turn me down at times but dey r those dat raise me up..teaching me to be a great person..i love dem lots lots..i want them to have a better life.. i want them to be happy! i promise to not let u guys down again..i will learn to be strong..learn to grow up
-great friends to remain great friends forever! even if u hav done something wrong to disapoint me..i promise i wont give up so easily..i will still be there.. i will give u my hand..so please hold me..coz i will pull u up..just like the way u always do to me..

Wishlist..if onli i can:
-DSLR!
-Travelling..
-Photo hunting
-Volunteer jobs..old folks+childcare (need ppl to go with)
-Dance Dance..wanna take up ragae classes
-LOSE WEIGHT! haha.. 5more kgs..if can 10! lol..i need strong determination
-a better ME!
-Sumone to be there..

If only i can..

2008-06-23T09:49:00.002+08:00

i feel bad now again..i have 2 in me i think.. i cant stand on my own..i cant make my own decisions..i cant control myself..iim sick of this but wad am i suppose to do? i think i need to attend some workshop or programme.. i really wanna change..

People around me has been too caring..they think more den i do..i've actually took up a part time job but well i feel bad quiting last minute..The boss is nice i can tell..i would love to..but i cant go against my dad..the love ones around me who has been so caring..sitting down talking to me the whole night..they are those i turn to when i have problems..and standing on my side, they really think i shouldnt take the risk..so i end up disapointing the boss and a babe of mine..im sorry babe..i would love to..but im being protected so much..they still think its illegal unless its approved by ICA..

I've stressed myself up for the last week..and today is monday..i love monday..i seems to make a conclusion to all the problems im facing..im learning to say NO! the biggest problem in me is duno how to say no.. i always think of not disapointing people so i tried my best not to turn him/her down eventho i might not be happy with wad it is.. i will be strong! i am learning to be.. yes..we cant please everyone..

Noticed dat all my previous posts were bout the -ve me..ah..i no longer wanna cry and blog..haha~ and im not crying now..i thought i would be.. but i didnt..i just feel bad after calling the boss..im so sorry!i've bring a lot of troubles..its my mistake goin for the interview in the very first place..im sorry!

Thanks to those love ones around me..i know u guys care and thats y u were telling me wad i should do or i should not.. sorry if i turn u down..but i will be strong! i wil stand on my own.. and thanks to 'Sh*t-ing Machine' for entertaining me ysterday... im sure i wud feel very miserable ysterday if its without u.. thanks..u scratch my back..and i scratch urs too! XD

time for a change..

2008-06-21T09:57:00.002+08:00

i dun like blogging..coz whenever i cry i will blog..sigh..so im crying now..i feel bad..im such a bad daughter..im really bad..im sorry but im hating myself for now again..so many weaknesses inside..i reali hate it.. i cant control myself..i burst in tears again..

i have to much to learn..i wanna be strong..i wanna able to make decisions on my mind..im so sick of this kerren.. a girl that cries whenever she cant take it..and turns to thousand of ppl for opinions and end up confusing herself.. i wanna stand on my own..

i look around..i thought no body gona be there..but i see everyone there..always there smiling at me helping me.. i dun hate daddy for not getting me a cam, i dun hate daddy for not letting me go vietnam..i cried bcoz i feel bad..he has been treating me so nicely but i always turn him down..i really sorry daddy..i wanna tell u this..but i cant..whenever i keep silent on the phone..its all because im crying and im afraid to let u hear my voice trembling.. i really love u.. the more i hear u talking...the more i feel bad.. i such a bad child..one dat dun reali know how to manage herself.. i hope i wil be different in this coming birthday..i wanna grow up.. i wanna be a better me..i will try my best.. i know that in life, we wont be able to please everyone around us..and sorry to those that i turn down to..

i have been learning to be patient in people..and i guess i m doing ok with that.. i have to now learn to stand on my own decisions.. and control myself.. i dunno.. whenever im with those close to me..i cant really hide my feelings.. i will burst into tears in second..i cant really hold it.. i dun wanna be a weak me..

i know everyone loves me.. friends stay in singapore just to celebrate my birthday.. daddy coming singapore also.. i can realy feel their love..and i thank them for being so nice to me.. i know that everyone care..and yea im gona be strong.. sorry to those that i turn down to..sorry to those that i took them for granted.. sorry..u know ur presence is very important to me..im sorry if i ever offend u in some way..but trust me.i love u all!

some might not treat me the best way..but its ok..i feel good doing wad i love.. i love being close with u, i love being annoying to u..and i hope u dun mind.. i know it mite be very annoying sumtimes..but i dunno..im trying to show as much care as i can..i never know if one day i mite just disapear and mite not have the chance to tell u how much i care and love u.. thats y im always nagging..always asking ppl close to me to go out together.. u know i love u..there are certain people that make me feel good wheneever im with them.. they make me feel, im who im..i dont have to pretend to be someone else..and yea i love dem..i know we have been so close..and time might come when we have to seperate..but no matter what..we will try our best to spend as much time as possible together now.. im realy gona miss u all.. people that keep me busy everyday.. people that suddenly shout i wanna go eastcoast in the middle of havin dinner.. and zoom we went..

birthday coming soon..meaning Rien will be going back to korea soon..the girl that keep me accompany..the Lion that we always tease..im gona miss u like hell..i guess everyone will! the decisions are made..and we have to get along with it..i didnt want to accept the fact just yet..but i guess i should..day by day, i will try to convience myself.. nothing is forever..but at least we treasure each other..and we had great memories together.. and Uyen, the other lovely girl that tap my shoulder n tell me not to cry.. i love u.. i know we wont be in the same class anymore..but i hope we stil hang out together..eventho it might be weird without lion..but we will be strong.. and i will try to be strong too..

as life goes on..

2008-05-16T02:03:00.002+08:00

Spiritual and thoughtful, you tend to take a step back from the world.
You're very sensitive to what's going on around you, yet you remain calm.
Although you are brilliant, it may take you a while to find your niche.
Your creativity is supreme, but it sometimes makes it hard for you to get things
done. [somehow..i find it kinda true..]

just saw the clip of a korean singer, Kim Min Soo who past away a few weeks ago due to motorcycle accident. Felt so sorry about that.. People, we really have to live life to the fullest, we will never know whats gona happen next..so do appreciate..everyone around u! Felt sorry for the victims of Myanmar and China's disaster.. Sigh..why cant the world be peaceful? where everyone live forever.. peacefully together.. all i can do now is pray for them.. lets put our hands together, do watever we can to help those that need to be helped..

A random post from my fren's blog,

Life Brief Candle
Life is like a glowing candle that's fragile and short.
It will just blow off anytime, anywhere as fast as a snap of fingers.

That is so true..Thanks to Venus for such meaningful words..

At the moment when i was having fever, i felt that the world suddenly turns blue around me..i see no colours..i felt so lonely, so alone..so worry..i hate to fall sick..it gives me a feeling of so unsure..so uncomfortable..hope i get well soon..dont like to feel uncomfortable..dont like to feel weak..

im feeling so sorry for the victims of the disaster..so sad now~ everyone! we must hold our hands together..help those needed!in any ways that u can.. by donation or perhaps just by praying..but do donate.. a small amount can accumulate to big if everyone do help..

guess i better stop blogging..am feeling so down..so sad for those involved..we really do need to appreciate everyone around us..love them..cherish them..for the moments that we can do so, please do so..like wad ppl always say..u nvr know wads gona happen tmr..

2008-05-14T00:56:00.002+08:00

urh..hate to say dat..but yeah im SICK again!! hate falling sick but well who loves it rite? haha~

had a bad fever on sat and sunday..kicked it off on monday but stil have cough and sore throat even till now.. sad! y must it be this time? my bro and sausau are here..i wanna teman dem eat nice food, but i cant! no fried food, no oily food, no chilli = no everything!

The cause of my sickness:
1. One whole week of intensive gym workout! (but show no results..sob!)
2. Wednesday, went Zouk with Wendy.. had fun dancing but too bad oni 2 of us.. and honestly i dont realy enjoy dancing on da dance floor full of ppl =S arh.. got home round 4am
3. Thursday, went Hotpot with classmates (thanks to LOHPINGCHUAN for the sudden craving! ) den had desserts at bugis too (thanks to Melvyn for the treat) got home round 1am
4. Friday, had SukiSushi buffet with besties (thanks to Cardin's bday treat) den went for movie (what happens in vegas..2thumbs up!) den went payalebar for dinner (thanks uyen for the sudden craving of vietnamese food)..got home around 12.30am
5. Saturday..met up with Bro and DaSau at Bugis for lunch..thats when i start feeling dat i got sore throat..so didnt eat much..den went Mustafa to shop..and wow, Bro bought me a Guess watch! XD happy happy! a watch dat i paid oni 6bucks coz he paid 200. lol~ den went California for step 101 class, my god..i felt like fainting in da class.. MAXMAXMAXMAXMAX~ after dat..i turned pale..so uyen asked me to go home rest.. [Actual plan on dat nite- to go a club in clarke quay, called the clinic] --Failed due to me falling sick.. Sorry guys!

arh..Chiong too much dats y fell sick..not shud i said fallen sick coz im stil sick!! im fighting the disease so badly.. and a friend actualy asked if i had my face washed this morning or not coz i look like jus woke up from sleep..man, im SICK! guess its written on my face too..never know its soooo serious..gotta put on make up tmr incase others find me pale-looking again..

orite..till now den.. *cough cough* its 1.20am..gotta hit the sack now..nitez~

2008-05-05T23:46:00.002+08:00

i..im disappointed once again..for something that i never want it to happen again..

sigh..y is it so? i know i shud just support..but why r u telling me when u have already make the decision? once again i feel fooled.. everytime i think im close but u made decision without actualy teling me beforehand i feel bad inside i feel down..i feel as if im no one to u..perhaps im just sumone u fake a smile to.. i feel down coz i take u as a real friend..once again heart broken by wad i thought its a real friend..and u never know how long it takes to heal or i shud say the wound wil remain there..a gap between u and me..

im feeling stronger this time..i didnt cry like wad i did before to a real friend. i know that we shudnt expect returns from wat we give.. and therefore i wont be sad coz u r not taking me as a real friend, i might just be disapointed but i wil finish my part as a real friend to u..i wil stil give wat i think i shud..and not expecting any return..dats wat friends are.. if im expecting returns then i wil sure die bcoz of friends..lol~ haha! i've promised myself to care whoever i wanna care but not expecting any fair returns.. ^^ and i made it!

i've tried my best..i've told u my advice..i've told u wads in my thoughts..and sorry if u feel annoyed..i just wanna let u know..I CARE! i really do.. and now its all up to u.. to go or to leave.. im not being bias wan u to be by my side..im just teling u the truth..

arh ok..enough bout this..im feeling stronger inside..im mentally strong! knowing that no one is gona impress u forever and not leting u down..no one is gona be there when u needed them most..im me myself..standing on my own!

had a great day with Uyen today..shopped, movie and gym, and FOOD! haha~ lol~ im happy we made it..for combat and pump! motivation is all we need.. and self determination.. so what if others think we cant..as long as we believe in ourselves.. we need no one to judge but ourselves.. and iron man is indeed a good show..trust me..eventho it might b abit draggy..

ah..listening to my current fav song tittled i thank you by Cadence Blaze. Thanks to MingLung for dl-ing dat song for me late lastnite..hehe~ i gues its an old song and pretty hard to find it online.. its a nice song! ^^

"I Thank you for the joy that you bring to me, i thank you for a wait keep in love brand new.I thank you for the kiss that make fallin into you (baby)thank you.thank you. True love is you.." here goes the lyrics~

2008-04-30T00:55:00.005+08:00

its always good to know dat u have readers..and ehemz, thanks for reading yea! XD

i've been through so much..among the laughters i find tears..but this will just make me stronger day by day.. and im glad dat i've made myself clear of everything! nothing is left unsaid and its always good to be honest to each other.. i shouldnt say i have no friends, in fact i have too many that i could bearly tell whose more important but why care? rank shouldnt be the 1st consideration.. afterall jus treat them the way u want to.. care nothing bout returns..just give and one day im sure u will sumhow feel that they just love u as much as u love dem! ^^

Expo- Hotdogs $1..buy la!!

For the Student council Expo week, im really glad to those who managed to turn up and helped out..we had so much fun and tiredness! haha its a great event afterall..and thanks to those that turned up for my dance perf.. u people rocks my world LA!! *shake shake* i understand that sum people just dun show how much they care eventho they reali do.. i wont care bout that but pls dont stop me from showin u my care..haha~ i wil treat u good good eventho u treat me bad bad..as long as i think u r worth me doing so.. i care for who i am but not for who u r~ XD i duno wad im talkin bout..lol~ and to da dance babes! we did a great job!! ^^ yeay~ do check our utube for the clip..search mdis dance or siewlin711

Dance Babes!

im leading myself to a +ve world now and yeas! its a good begining i believe.. i nid no one to guide me there coz i have everyone ahead of me leading me there.. ^^ great friends all around..

im now in Brunei..got back here on 25th nite, went to kk from 26th till 28th with my family and yea..its a long but fun trip i shud say.. haha~ and arhh..i hate coughing! im physically strong but week inside.. hate the bacteria..*kill kill* will be goin back to SG soon...on da 2nd of May.. and people are saying..why do i fly so often? i have huge wings mah! ^^ lolz~

went out with Yeon and Chieh in da afternun and yea its never been so great chatting together..^^ laughin all over when Yeon did da mimming kinda moves! lol~ and we actualy played in da children's bouncer outside civic center..haha omg!! never tot we could stil get in without actualy damaging the bouncer..haha~ had dinner with koko and sau sau and chee chee at excapade ..and yummy sushiiii!! haha~ we had fun chatting too..laughed out loud..never tot we had so much craps to talk bout and yea..its fun! im gona miss all of them when im in SG..

all pics gona be uploaded perharps tmr since im lazy? haha sleepy?

here's da pics of mah phones! thanks koko for the new phone.. ^^ Love him as always!

New Motorola V9!

My customized N76!

personalized N76!

2008-04-20T00:22:00.003+08:00

if they are true friends, they wont say such words to hurt you... yeah u r totally right..but i dunno why it stil hurts inside..

i hate that uncertainties happen everyday..sigh nothing goes exactly as planned.. watever it is..just have to accept the fact.. a decision dat affects the entire upcoming year..

infact, i have not enough confidence in me.. appearance do matter in bringing up the confidence of one's.. perharps its not true only when u have a group of damn close friends around which u can always stick to them, lead on them, stay under their protection.. i dunno.. i have noone that i can really rely on.. i wonder why.. like who really do care? sigh.. i hope i can luckily find one..

hate that tears love me recently.. trying hard to control but i just cant.. part of growing up, as u go through lots of happening, u will tend to learn more and understand more.. noone will be there forever to give u a hand.. sometimes we just have to stand on our own.. feel the whole world urself..

Thanks God that my results turn out to be surprisingly good.. finally it gives me a reason to smile.. and time to pamper myself again..

To those who walk in and stab me: i wil make u eat ur words soon!

2008-04-17T23:26:00.002+08:00

thinking back..

why should i care what other says? im just who i am.. why should i feel hurt from their words? im standing up for myself now..so what if they hate me..so what if they think i aint perfect..i shall not think of those who hurt me..i must always remember those who will stand beside me..give me a hand and smile at me telling me that i can do it..

im always gladful to those beside me..i love u all..whenever im down..u talk to me..give me confidence once again..people, i dont mind u judging but please think about it before u talk..i mean it will somehow hurt people indirectly, u never know how much pain that will cause..

i started to realise who is more important to me..some people words tend to hurt me, but some people can just come along, talk to me like 5 minutes and im totally a brand new confident kerren again.. how powerful that is..it makes me think that, i shall only listen to those people i think is important to me and ignore those who just come along and mess up my life..

my housemate told me, if they hurt u..why shud u let them to continue staying beside u hurting u more.. but i dun wanna lose friend jus like dat.. mayb we all need time.. i will be more stronger..day by day im learning to be..and i know I CAN! because of ur presence making me feel strong and fresh everyday..thanks everyone <3 is all around..

2008-04-16T22:54:00.002+08:00

i dont know..

i guess i have problems..perharps its all me myself..somehow it hurts inside..am feeling down for a few minutes..but after i get home i feel way better..

is there anyone for me? i guess no..

i just need sumone there..listening to me..talk to me..i need a shoulder..

2008-04-07T00:40:00.004+08:00

time flies..

its been a year now.. i've been in Singapore for a year now! and i hav to thanks a lot of people..for being there with me through the days, for cheering me up when im down.. you will never know that your presence actualy make a great difference in my life..to all my dance mates! linda,shan,irene,kayln.. my class mates! dj,cardin,rien,uyen,willy.. my student council mates!Anais,fah,wendy,brian,daniel,harry and all.. my housemates of course! June,Ivan,Hooisiang,AuntMelia,Valerie and AuntMaria.. and alot alot more! u all hav been so great to me.. i reali love u all.. and thanks to those chatters that keep me busy when im online..

i will never regret coming to SG for my studies..people here are great! and i've learnt so much..learn to be independent..learned to be alone..learned to handle stufs myself and lots more.. to all my beloved frens back in brunei, i miss u all and i will be back by JULY! XD i cant wait..

For the 1st week of March, i have been busy practising dance for MDIS's openhouse but it was a bit disapointing coz not much people turned up.. and the 2nd week? i dunno i think i was busy hanging out and shoppin with Irene Babe?! hehe.. ^^ and i went to Macao,HK and some part of China for last 2 weeks of March. I was there with my dad and yea i admit that China is a pretty nice place to shop! ^^ and Venetians in Macao is great! totally awesome! live like a v.i.p there.. haha~ met some great people during da tour in ChenDu and had some unforgetable memories back during da trip.. da toilet? ah, u cant imagine..its like those ancient kind of toilet where they dont have door and u can actually see those shit on da ground? no i just dont know the right word to explain..but eww.. haha~ and the food..hmm, not so nice when we were up in da mountain.. but i was satisfied when i get to see da beautiful scenery and SNOW! haha~ it was totally awesome!

Got back SG on da 30th of March and my class started on da 31st.. The feeling was great when u get to see everyone in da school again.. and ofcourse hectic lessons begin again and here we are to fight the books..but thats wad students do..we shall love it coz we sure will regret not enjoyin it when we r in work.. Watched RuleNo.1 yesterday and i was quite ok..i just dont like the actors' n actress's voices coz its not theirs..as in its not original at all..arh!! dun like dun like! but the storyline was quite okey lo eventho it was kinda confusin in da end..

My wishlist: A zinc bag, A pink sandal from newurbanmale?, a customized cam which produces vintage kind of pics..

XD Money money hom!!

2008-03-16T02:05:00.005+08:00

ouch..i know its dusty..so here i come to clear away the dust! XD

i mish bloggie..i really do.. many things happened..and im glad to tell u that 90% or perhaps 95% of dem were GREAT HAPPY UNFORGETABLE memories.. hehe~ 1stly thanks to MDIS Student Council members.. u all brighten up my Campus life! love u all lots lots! XD and to MDIS Dance Babes! u all r the reason for me to dance in MDIS, without u all..the dance class jus wont be as fun.. and im glad dat we all did it during open house! and love us of being camwhores! hehe.. Thanks for Irene too for making my hols sooooo damn full of pics! haha..i finaly found her...da other cam princess.. haha~ no..we shud say we r the take-weird pics kinda person..da ugly post.. haha especially da bluetooth thingy..lol~

orite..im teling u dat i've got a lot of pics to share..in fact too much to be posted here..so if u reali wanna hav a clear view of wad i meant by a lot..haha, u can go check out my facebook, add me at siewlin_711@hotmail.com .. with my babes and my sc-ians! ^^

its reaching the end of my 2nd week holidays..2 more weeks to go..and im glad dat the 1st 2 weeks were totally wonderful! im surrounded by great people and im thankful dat i got dem around me..omg, i duno y but i feel like hugging each of them.. hehe, u seriously have to know..a small thing or action can made ppl around u happy.. some people wil take dat small little action as a great appreciation..just like me.. eventho u just smiled at me, but im reali hapy to have u smiled at me.. XD i know its often difficult to get people to treasure u the way u treasure them..but i cant be selfish n i shudnt be..im not expecting returns anymore.. honestly i used to..when i tot dat i was being too good to this person when he or shee never treat me dat way in return, i wil slow my pace down perharps trying to walk away..but i kind of regret.. its all because of dat childish actions, i lost few great friends..but i stil believe..if they treasure me, dey wil hold me back even if i walked away..

a few pics here to brighten up da days..
The great Babes! XD with Lovynn!
Its just so fun with dem..

ah..i have more pics to post..but its 3am now..i have to get to bed now..goin to dance clas at jitterbugs tomorow ^^ wil update again..which mite be after 2 weeks..coz im goin to hk and china for 2 weeks from monday ^^ Maucks love u all..

2008-02-10T22:31:00.000+08:00

yooo.. its mie!!

haha, i was absent for a few days eh..and yea..no one ever rush me to blog! so i slack around.. *winks*

orite..here's some pics i promised to post up.. the pics of us hugging and touching during Student council team building event.. opps~ hehe.. check it out..

blind-folded

now den u understand how important it is to cherish those that help u tru..to actualy know their importance in ur life dat bring a difference..

hand in hand..the oni choice is to trust those u put ur hand on..

crossing the very very poisonous river?!! haha~ with lots of laughers n hugs?!!

getting through.. tough yet challenging

finally we r in da web!!

brian giving strategy sia..

dats teamwork!! lift it up~

guess wad? the tales of two sisters from a korean drama..haha lame rite?

we learnt alot of things dat day..most importantly TEAMWORK! ^^ it was fun.. yeayness.. double thumbs up! more joys to come... i truely hope~

oh..here come some pics taken when meeting Jennifer! ^^ i mish her.. yesh i do..

^^ it was a great nite.. n i mish her badly..

2008-02-01T00:58:00.000+08:00

series of great events happened for the past few days.. love those around me..and thanks for being there.. ^^ u all brightened up my life.. but well..i hafta admit dat im tired!! arh.. i need some fresh air out there..wanna go to the beach.. sit on the beach listening to my fav musics.. and feel the breeze..it sounds so great..

back to those great days..

yeayness im finally a member of Student council..and yea..i was so nervous for the 1st meeting coz i know noone there except Chris (my fellow classmate) and thanks god the teambuilding event turned out to be very fun and exciting.. ^^ i bet everyone was havin fun dat day.. from the anyhow-whoever whacking to the drama queen to the 3 legged games..it was great and we all laughed through out the whole session..and never hav we expect the more adventurous games coming up next in the swimmingpool? haha the amphitheatre of MDIS.. wow~ the rain did not spoil the day in fact it made the games more excited.. haha~ and yea.. never forgeting all those bodycontacts we all had..arh.. i never tot dat it actually happened? *errrr* and our strategy before the game..it was so stupid.. haha~ our team planned the whole strategy and we kept practising it to see if it works..and yea..it worked.. but when its our turn..we realise that we misunderstood the game..haha so yea... our strategy turned out to be useless!! haha~ but it was fun and stupid doing all the stuffs so seriously but turn out to be totally different from wat we had to do.. i guess the greatest part wud be the crossing the poison pool game.. haha~ it was so dangerouse havin 9 or 8 of us standing on 3 chairs i suppose and yea moving one chair..from one end of the pool to the other end.. and wow~ i love our teamwork.. ^^ and finally the blindfold game.. it was yea kinda adventurous? haha as if walkin in a jungle blindfolded..all we can do is to trust the person infront of u..and felt the security when holdin on her/his shoulder.. the game is sumhow meaningful ^^ after all..this SC thingy isnt as bad as i tot.. infact it impressed me a lot.. so yea..wat u see mite not be wat it is.. u gotta feel it before judgin it..and i feel great being a part of MDIS student council..hmm its just the beginning.. and i feel dat i actualy missed a lot..how i wish i was part of it earlier..and i hope its not to late yet.. i believe there r more fun coming up ^^ cant wait...i wil try to upload the pics taken during da fun day of SC teambuildin once i got em..and im sure u will laugh when browsing through em.. hehe~

yesterday was a hectic day.. ahaha.. orite start off with Rien's bday ^^ it was a surprise to her..dat me and Uyen actually bought a cake and mcdonalds and walked al the way to her house from tiongbahru plaza without telling her..and Uyen called her once we were outside her doorstep.. haha~ for the first few calls she didnt answer..and ouch me and uyen were pretty afraid dat Rien actualy sleep soundly d..and thanks god after few trials..she called back and yea we surprised her when she saw us standin infront of her door.. hehe~ ^^ dats wat we call fren.. nvr call her.. all we did is went home pack our clothes, buy food and invited ourselves to her house.. haha~ ^^ she tot she was dreaming.. and we had fun dat nite..

da next day the 3 of us were late for class..and yea kena bomb by lecturer..opps~ but well nvm..dats part of being students.. canot owes be good kid ma.. hehe~ after class we went orchard to have sakura buffet as lunch..ouch we were all sooo damn full.. went back to schol for dance after dat..we actualy practised till 7.45..damn tired sia..at one point i was thinkiing to cancle my date with kalyn to zouk..but i know by doin dat i wil disapoint her..and so i turned up too ^^ eventho i was kinda tired but i enjoyed the night we had fun together ^^ the music, the surrounding, the dance moves which i find abit weird but very cute to hav everyone doin the same moves, the people i was with..they r all great!! and also the vodka orange.. everything was great..its oni me that was tired which spoil a bit of the mood.. but honestly i did enjoy.. it was fun..and yea dats my 1st real clubbing experience.. so great! and thanks to those with me.. without u all.. clubbin will again disapoint me.. haha~ coz i owes tot it was suppose to be fun until the 1st day i went MOS..arh forget bout dat story.. hehe.. ^^ im glad dat i had finally enjoy the real feel of clubbing.. move it move it~ haha

oh yea..not forgeting that i got to meet up with Jennifer before she flying off to Aussie a few days back.. it was great with her and her brothers n mama! ^^ i mish u all lots lots!! and thanks to her uncle for the great dinner and walk in chinatown.. chiew ah.. i miss u.. we did manage to catch up our lifes with each other but we mite miss some details.. anyway its ok.. true frens belive in each other n have faith in each other.. hehe~ i love u lots chiew! and hope ur bro dun gila over the psp la... and goodluck to chong en for his upcomin big big exams this year..and help ur mama with houseworks la..hehe~ dun forget to invite me over to ur studio k? i oso wanna invest one..but can i use monopoly money? *faints*

more pics to be uploaded when im free.. i got class tomolow sia.. hehe and its 2 am now..im feelin sick and tired but i stil stay up late.. arh~ duno wad m i tinkin haha..anyway sumting great to share with mdis-ians..there r finally power points/plugs in the library.. haha~ so everyone wil die when using it ah?!! duh~ cant stop recallin wad da librarian said to me b4.. the plugs wil be wat i gona complain nex and i was glad dat they fix dem up b4 i even make my complain.. dats great job mdis.. hehe but pls dun shout at students in the library la.. i hope i was the last victim.. yeay~ we can do our works with laptop in da library..finally! ^^

okie..i better stop bloggin..or else i wil hav to cancle al my plans tmr.. hehe~ its gona be a better day.. gonna have faith!

2008-01-26T00:17:00.000+08:00

to those who love and care.. dear papa and koko

i feel so bad now.. crying for the 2nd time in a day again? arh.. okie..its time to admit.. i had a bad day a few days back..it all because of california fitness..

after talkin to daddy, i promised to sign for the 6 months contract..but when i go there i signed 21months instead.. okie my reason for signin 21 months is bcoz 6months i can only go for alternative days.. or i can go before 5 and after 9.. see my class finish at 5 sumtimes.. meaning if there is dance class in between 5 n 9..i cant get in..

6months cost me 600+ and 21months cost 1164.. mayb u wud say im juz greedy.. i dunno.. arh!! am i makin the wrong decision to sign for 21 months?!! its not because my fren sign for 21 months so i follow.. no its not!! plus all our expiry dates are different.. i joined 21months not becoz of them.. its my own decision plus they never try to persuade me to join 21months.. infact they do ask me to try out for 6 months.. but i guess in ur guys eyes.. im just one who love to follow frens.. watever they have, i jus wanna have.. no its not!! its totally not becoz of them.. plus they dun join dance classes.. i go for the dance classes alone!! i feel sad when i know that u guys think me dat way.. okie.. i know im one who cant make decision myself perharps always seeking advice from others.. and i know i get influenced easily..but not all the time.. i had my own thinking too.. y cant u just understand?

i understand that i mite quit easily sumtimes.. but i know i have passion for dance! and im sure bout that.. why scold before i even quit? i know u scold coz u love me and care me.. but try to understand me and believe in me.. i think i can do it.. even if the whole world dun hav confidence in me.. u shud be the one pulling me up tellin me that i can do it.. but not telling me that ppl get bored easily in this kind of thing.. upon hearing that i know u hav no confidence in me and u think i wil soon be one of them.. how am i suppose to get tru when u dun even give me a hand.. all i need is just some positive support.. not those words that bring me down.. i know i disapointed u.. but its not a fact yet.. how can u tell dat im 100% quiting and get bored before i even start? please have faith in me.. because im one of those that cant b sure of herself too.. i need u to give me streght but all i get is -ve feedback..im realli afraid i will soon be wat u tot i mite be.. quiting very soon.. but i told myself..i have to prove to u.. i will make the 21months worth it!! even if the whole world turn me down.. i oni nid some +ve words from u to give me streght.. because i love u as much as u love me too.. just try to understand me..and im sorry coz i know i have disapointed u.. the more u talk bout it to me..the more i feel bad about myself..im so sorry.. i cried because i know its my fault but thats my own decision.. i have finally made a decision myself and yet u prove that its wrong..

have faith in myself.. im learning to be strong even without ur support.. its hard coz i have no one to lean on anymore.. but i know this is just a part of growing up.. i dun wan this issue to be a wall blockin us.. im sorry for wat i have done.. i told myself i wont regret coz i wil make use of it..and make it worthwhile.. i just wanna prove to u..

im sorry peeps.. its just a post of confession to my koko and daddy who for sure wil not read.. but i duno how to tell them face to face.. i feel so wrong infront of them.. i know i have no right to ask them to support me instead.. its all my fault.. but i dun wanna cry over it again.. ii just think by bloggin i wil feel better...

2008-01-25T12:07:00.000+08:00

i duno if this could b my last time crying over the matter.. i jus couldnt let go.. couldnt let the precious memories just remain as a dream.. but what is the point if only one side is trying to cherish the friendship? only one side is showing the love? and only one side is tryin to bring everything back? maybe i should just dont think bout it anymore? i duno if i can make it.. that moment is a colourful moment in my life..how can i jus wipe them off this way ? it wont be too late to apologize.. but if onli u all know.. im standing rite here waiting.. the longer i wait, i suffered..coz i stil cherish our friendship.. if only one day i stop thinking and everything wil never be the same again thats for sure..thats when the memories realli dies in my heart.. sista reminds me the phrase in my blog.. 'dont waste today thinking bout yesterday'.. its hard for me but im trying.. things just couldnt get better..

orite..i know i shud stop thinkin.. for the next time i go back..i hope things wil get better.. thats just a hope with lilttle chance of happening..no matter wad, i wil giv it a try.. i reali have to thank cheeboon.. for so long.. i gues he is the only guy who treat me as a great friend..who show his love and care whenever im around or even when im not.. y couldnt they b this way too? and when yeon's mum said.. i got no other frends except yeon.. my heart feel so empty becoz it sounds so true.. if its without yeon.. i gues i wud jus stick with my family everyday back in brunei..and thanks to elza n vivi dem too..they r owes the one dat show up.. we mite not have great conversation..but being together in a room even not talkin the same topic or great topic..we could feel the love that link us together..i cherish them! cherish those being so great to me..

i will give it a one last try.. if onli i cud make u feel the same way like im feeling..

2008-01-24T14:02:00.000+08:00

my 100th post!

arh.. was browsing tru sista's photoes..and saw some pics of her with hao, kai, jack and wei... my eyes fill with tears.. i dunno y tears started to flow..i guess i reali do miss u all and..the smile on ur faces! i miss u all!! how i wish i can turn back time..i mish u all!! mish those great times we had together.. and now everything is just memories.. let it remain.. forever in my heart.. i was once filled with love from u all..thanks..

i dunno.. recently i become kinda depress? nah.. people told me.. when u gain sumting..u will also lose sumting..and its so true.. i seriously lost few great frens.. i duno y.. we used to be sooo close..but in a blink of an eye..we became strangers.. wud oni say hi when pass by each other.. how i wish time wud stop at those great moments we had together.. from so sweet to so bitter..i feel so empty! if u ask me wats my greatest wish for 08.. besides healthy family, i would reali love to hav all my true friends back..i mish u guys! all those great moments! why couldnt we just sit down together again..have a drinks and jus talk crap?! mish those laughers we used to have.. whats realli our relationship? i also dunoo.. if only my wish can come true..

i shud be happy dat this is my 100th post..im sorry to start off with tears.. most probably also bcoz of the song im listening to now.. kinda low~ orite..time to update..

im sorry to be late.. happy belated to dear Kalyn! i know its late..haha~ we had a great time at the chalet.. *smile* hope its ur greatest 21st birthday! and goodluck to everyone in da same class as kalyn n shan! jiayou! ^^ irene jie.. ka yau ah!

im working on my plan.. my 6mths plan! i hope it works.. and i hope u can see the results too..i hope im not that lazy.. and i wil make those people eat their words!! orite..u wont know wat i mean..haha~ the world is just so realistic.. if u not pretty.. please stand aside! *sad* 14thfeb.. gona b alone again.. dun wanna face but have to.. i hope i can get thru it with few frens.. maybe stuck in sauna? hahaa..

been dancing for the past two days.. tired tired! aching all over.. and yea.. i din exercise today.. lazy! plus m tired la..my neck is painful.. gona dance tomorow i hope.. ^^ passion for dance! and yea..am glad to have met Uyen and Rien.. the two dat made my adv dip class a little more lively and colourful.. thanks.. and yea..we shall work hard together!! okey.. wat time we meet tomorow? ahha.. and the stayovers..love these girls! ^^

camwhored during shopping.. and yea..im broke!! arh.. i wanted a nike bag.. black nike bag with gold linings!! cost me 62$$ arh.. i wantt!!

arh.. im in da student council.. XD hope i can really bond dem with da membership department..coz dun reali like the feeling of not in one.. arh..its gona be a busy year..and hope more colourful!! i mish brunei.. i wanna go back so badly.. cant meet to meet those great friends and great family..

'When u make a decision..u draw a line.. and its not in the sand but in the cement..' i find this really meaningful.. and yea.. i have drawn one of mine in the cement! ^^

2008-01-18T01:19:00.000+08:00

haha..was so stress over the incident and this friend told me.. dont waste today to think of yesterday..and yea its just so true! ^^

Orite talking bout wed.. went to dance clas den had dinner with Lishan at orchard.. we were both tired but yea i was glad dat i have her with me.. we talked for quite long..and yea i owes love her around me..^^

met some weird incidents in da bus home.. okie..there is dis gal who i tink dont have coins to pay for the bus ride..she intended to pay the 2 dollar notes but sumhow the driver dun wanna accept..the girls paid only 90cents but the trip actualy cost $1.10 so she nid 20cents more..after a few stops..the driver stopped the bus and walked to the passengers area telling the girl that her 90cents are over..and the girl replied i have no 20cents..i want pay u 2dollars but u dont want..den the indian bus driver told her to take it from any of the passegers..i actualy feel like giving her.. but she was kind of angry dat she threw the 2dollars note to da indian driver..the driver did not pick up but walked back to the driver seat can drove on.. the 2dollars note is stil on da floor..no one pick it up.. the others just stare..so was i too..

den here come this ahpek from the upper deck..he came down..saw the money.. pick it up.. look around showing a wanted-to-ask-whose-money-is-dat look..but he didnt ask..and put it into the pocket and drop off the bus.. i couldnt stop my laugh but smiled..i wanted to laugh actually.. haha.. the ahpek look is so innocent sia..haha..n i saw the others are trying to cover up their smile too.. haha~

and another uncle..arh i dunno..he look a bit drunk to me..came up the bus den duno had some beh song talk with the driver..den he kept mumbling to himself saying wad indian in singapore bla bla bla.. haha..no one is trying to listen to him i can tell.. the feeling is so scary.. had sumone there talkin to himself as if wanted to fight with the driver.. after alightin..i saw him stil keep lookin at da bus and mumbling..or shud i say he is talkin out loud? arh.. i feel bad for the driver.. it was his unlucky day i gues..haha~ weird cases

orite..its time to bed after teling my stories.. hehe~ ^^ live a better life!

2008-01-18T00:52:00.000+08:00

Singaporean? arh.. i also dunno wad to comment..

but foreign friends around me told me that their impression for singaporeans are rude?!! i was quite surprised because its not only one of them telling me so.. its like 5 or more of them.. >< maybe i couldnt really feel it coz those singaporeans around me are great frens!and i find them quite friendly too.. maybe yea..as a stranger u mite think Singaporean as those bossy type...rude rude de.. but trust me..there are exceptions!!

arh.. i had bad experience at school library last wed.. or mayb shud i say im just too unlucky?!! notice that the Library in Mdis doesnt allow students to plug in their laptop chargers..and yea..dey actualy paste the socket with black scotch tape.. okie.. i was there in the library and i saw this girl charging her laptop with dat plug..and yea i know its illegal coz she took off the scotch tape.. haha~ den after she charged, i charged mine too.. haha and yea..this come da school librarian.. wow~ walking over my place shouting!! haha..

"HEY UNPLUG UR CHARGER! DONT YOU KNOW YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSE TO CHARGE IT HERE?! WHY DID YOU REMOVE THE SCOTCH TAPE HUH??!" i was so stoned.. i didnt really care what he is saying..i stood up and uplug it.. den his words made me laugh.."CANNOT CHARGE HERE LA.. WHAT IS BOOMB? HOW? WE ALL DIE HERE LA?!!" haha.. i was so stoned that i didnt notice wad crap he is saying..until he went off and i realised.. huh?! all die here la?? haha.. i wanted to laugh out loud.. even my friends who were beside me wanted to laugh too..

okie people..i m sorry if it actualy bomb?!! haha..okie.. i dunno if pluging in a laptop charger will cause so serious disaster.. orite..im so curious that i really feel like finding out the answer and yea..if he is not rite.. jaga him ah!! haha.. not forgeting how he end his scolding.. "IF NEXT TIME I SEE YOU DOING THIS AGAIN..I WILL BAN U FROM COMING TO THE LIBRARY".. walau!! so rude sia.. imagine a new student coming to this school.. and 1st time goin to the library..den hear such thing.. wat will be her/his feeling?!! OMG!! the image of MDIS... SPOILED sia!! okie.. i dont blame him for scolding me since its my fault.. but man.. please relax la..thats not the way ookey.. imagine sum VIP visiting our school on that day and heard wat u said.. omg! dont have to be so rude..its not that i dont understand english ok..and im not deaf either!!

i once saw him scolding another guy too..and that guy..i can tell from his look and behaviour that he might be somehow mentally challenged but not so seriously i think.. and yea its obvious.. he was playing game using da library computer and again this librarian came and shout at him.."DONT YOU KNOW YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSE TO PLAY GAMES USING SCHOOL COMPUTERS? ITS FOR STUDY PURPOSE! AND IF I SEE U PLAYING GAMES AGAIN I WILL BAN U FROM COMING INTO THE LIBRARY". At that point..me and my friend were so angry dat we felt like complainin the librarian.. cant u be more gentle? ok..its his fault.. but u can tell that he is abit of mentally challenged wad!! why should u shout at him? as if wanting everyone in the library know.. shheessh!!

Library is supposed to be a peaceful place..and yea..even if u caught people doing something wrong..u dont have to shout.. dont u know how to respect those who are concentrating on their studies?!! u as a librarian should know that, it is suppose to keep silent at the library okey!?

arh.. feeling so damn angry now.. finally off stress coz done assignment but thinkin back this incident seriously make me feel dat Library isnt so comfortable for me.. it gives me a bad impression..arh~

2008-01-15T23:14:00.000+08:00

Guess wad? i managed to shop alone in Queensway..and i spent $300!!

haha, bought an addidas shoe..and some sports attire! im ready for sports babey~ haha.. cant wait to start..but dat wil be after Chinese new year.. and bought few cny clothings too!! broke broke!! ><

WAtched Body #19 yesterday.. it was fun with Rien and Uyen! hehe..we were like crazy girls laughing outside the cinema.. haha~ the movie was quite ok.. arh.. dont understand why the ghost actually look so like alien? arh!! mutation ei?? weird sia.. pretty disappointing.. still think Shutter the best!

its 11.23pm now..arh and im so stucked doing my assignment.. lazy lazy lar!! hehe~ went for Student Council interview today.. wish me luck.. it was quite ok throughout..

there was sumthing i heard from the radio and wud love to share with u all..but i forgotten..arh~~ too bad.. ehhe.. drop in again when it appears in my mind..

nites~ im fighting for my assignment.. ehhe~

its in my new year's list! 케런&리엔 날씬해 질꺼야~~더이상 코끼리가 아니야 !!

2008-01-13T23:07:00.000+08:00

on da 12th..

its kukup trip! ^^

and yea..it was soo fun with those frens.. we took thousands of pic! ^^ the places were quite ok but the people were great!! like i said.. where u go is not important..who u r with is more important and i was glad dat i hav dem with me~ i had so much fun cam whoring~ **opps!**

da breakfast..

da fish farm

caught doin sumting illegal.. sorry la..we dun understand the words in da board ma..
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eh ben.. y kacau kacau at the back?

im finally out of da pot!

arh..i have more more pics to blog lei.. but so laggy sia.. tmr den blog maybe.. hehe~ i wana go to bed now..sleepy! tired!! ^^ tomorow got class again.. arh~

nites nites!

2008-01-13T22:33:00.000+08:00

i was once soo weak again but thanks u guys for giving me the strenght to stand up again! ^^ without u people around me.. i duno where wud i be.. cherish everyone around u! i love u guys! for those who always try to make me laugh when i feel down.. who came up with lame jokes.. and those who always cheer me up telling me to be strong. love u all!

for the past few days.. i was really tired but i can tell that i was happy all the days! ^^ my days were fill with colours! more days to come..and all will also be filled with colours! dats all because i all good frens around me~ ^^

on da 11th of Jan,
Arh..its FM class test day.. had class at 9am and guess wad? i woke up at 8.30am! omg.. i quickly ran to the bathroom and was my face n brushed.. packed some schol books den took a cab to school.. reached sound round 9.03 and lecturer wasnt there yet.. luckily~ den flipped tru da notes..so lazy to review.. da test ended round 11.30! pheww~ went straight away to da gym since there was this dance class going on.. n yea..once again i was lucki..coz it was jus about to start.. da schedule said it wud start at 11am.. haha~ finish dancin round 12.30.. den joined kick boxing class at 1pm.. omg! it was damn tiring la.. and my muscles aching all over now..but it was fun tho.. was thinkin to join this manicure pedicure class but ended up resting in da canteen.. haha~ was too tired!

MDIS was so lively dat day..full of events!! ^^ and yea lucky draw.. the 1st draw was round 1pm..checked the list and my numbers were not there..arh i got 4 tickets but none of my number there..arrhh.. guess mine is for top 25 den. .haha~ had this captain ball game round 4.. and yea..it was fun!! guys.. u all did a great job and yea it was fun playing around.. hehe~ and we won $21 for dat game..cool lei~ ended round 5.30 so we went down to da canteen..and yea.. de lucky draw was going on!! didnt get to hear a single number from my tickets for the last few prizes.. untilll daa 1st prize?!!

haha.. i was standing with mony talking to him until i heard da dj announcin da lucky number for da 1st prize.. he asked.. whose with the ticket with the number 0070 infront.. and i was like..oh my..so i put up my hand... he saw me..and asked..whats ur number? i shouted 3 and 9..den he asked again.. u mean 00703 and 00709? den i nodded my head.. excited! den he announced.. ladies n gentlemen..de winner is 00709! den i jumped and ran to da front.. hehe~ my 2nd lucky draw prize from MDIS! oh my god.. i took 2nd prize last 6 months during da funfair day..and today i took da 1st prize~ haha.. it was the same lady who gave me the prize.. she said : waa..u again!? haha lucky lucky!! hehe.. i love her coz i think she gave me luck.. my lucky star! ^^

and here's my prize.. uPapa! hehe..like his name..its for my Papa!! ^^

never tot i can be so lucky.. hehe~ thanks MDIS again.. it was a great day..

2008-01-10T00:30:00.001+08:00

sumone ask me a very weird question today.. i jus smiled..coz i myself dunno the answer..i once tot of that question..but i've given up lookin for the answer since so long.. guess.. its a better way to jus leave it dat way.. no colour.. no taste..

Human beings are weird..i duno.. today like this.. doesnt mean tomorrow wil b like this.. what in this world is forever? i tried to find..and again..i guess nothing is forever.. its sad to know but thats just the fact.. or mayb someone wil prove to me that forever does exist.. im still thinking..

The longer i get to know u..the more i feel disapointed about.. i duno.. is it me the problem or is it u.. i gues me.. i just feel dat i cant actualy communicate well..can i? i dunno.. from a very bright little innocent girl..i turn into sumone dat thinks alot.. who wud actualy feel shy to speak up.. i hate this.. but i dunno.. im tryin to bring back myself.. it just seems to go away from me..

I seems to have a lot..but actually i have nothing inside... so empty inside..

2008-01-07T02:02:00.000+08:00

its 2.03am now.. im sooo sleepppyyy!!

haha..finaly done my powerpoint..effect havnt add in tho.. but nvm..wil do it tmr ^^ i wanna go back Brunei!! i wan relax!! i dun wan stress!! i wan papa!! haha~

Received a letter from my Taiwan penpal ysterday.. ^^ im realy glad to hav known her.. Tingin ^^ thanks for being my fren.. cant wait to go Taiwan.. my new year resolutions eh!! ^^

Listened to FM93.3 for the whole day.. i love Radio..at least i dun feel bored when i have Radio~ hehe..

Wansing called round 10pm.. We all miss her.. good luck to her studies.. guess Australia wil b a better place for her!*smile*

Didnt chat much today..coz kinda busy with my powerpoint..once again its pink and black! haha..my fav combination.. another fav wud b gold n white.. kekeke~ i wanna shop la..but no money how??!!! haha~ wanna relax.. kinda stress but luckily feelin better now coz i done the powerpoint d..

next stress -- 11th,Jan =FM class test=
relax relax -- 12th,Jan =Kukup Trip=
next stress -- 18th,Jan =MM Assignments due date=
relax relax -- 19th,Jan =Kalyn Bday party=
relax relax -- 25th,Jan =KBox Family gathering=
next stress -- 28th,Jan =BIS Assignment due date=

aww~ reali nid to start doin my assignments eh.. not even started yet..omg!! and so many BIS homeworks.. ouch! jiayou wei!! jiayou!! haha~

i want sushi tomorrow!! hehe.. ^^ i want sushi buffet!! yummy!! anyone want go with me?? ah.. enjoyin sunrise alone oledi very kelian wei..dun tel me i hav to enjoy sushi buffet alone again?? haha~ broke broke liao!!

Nites .. its 2.13am..

MC KING, MAY YOU REST IN PEACE! *Respect*

2008-01-05T23:45:00.000+08:00

blog..

i was suffering the lonely nite ysterday.. and yea..i managed to survive..well it wasnt as expected..it totally the other way round..but well..dun imagine it as too bad..its kinda bad..but not totally la..just feel like lonely..

hmm..went to East coast yesterday..and stayed over.. its my housemate's frend birthday..and yea..i was a bit regret..why did i go?!!! haha~ i should have stayeed at home enjoy online-ing! haha.. but nah nevermind..just to keep her company..

the place isnt as bad as thought but oni one room.. arh..imagine stayin with all those u dunno..arh..no ice breaking games summore..totally stranger lei.. all of them r from china..i felt so left out.. but luckily i have my housemate stick to me all the time..except some times when she was with her friend la..

the food was great tho..they din marinade but its great.. love pepper over it! ^^ new stufs.. nex time i shud try it when bbq..yummy! ^^ China people memang very good in food.. ehehe there were like 15 of us? or even more..but hardly talk.. only get to play more at midnite when we were playin cards in the room..luckily..the ice breakin game after midnite..duh~

At least it was fun riding bicycle tho.. wanted to ride the 2 seats one..but well no right person so yea..i rather ride alone..the breeze is nice.. i was alone out there watchin the sea feeling the breeze towards me listening to good musics for more than an hour.. it was such a lonely feeling.. but thanks to some frens who managed to accompany me through sms and phone calls!! ehehe..all encouraging me to dump my housemate and go home alone.. haha i wanted to..but i couldnt do it..how can i b so mean to her rite? ^^

dats wat i mean by alone..

things that help me through the nite...

Can u believe? im enjoying the sunrise view alone..?!! haha~ sounds so sad lar.. but yea thats the truth lei.. how i wish to get back home and SLEEPP!!! if oni there is sumone beside me.. sitting back to back.. talk to each other.. *arh.. i wish* i realli do..when wil dat day b.. East coast is a great place lor.. to paktoh? haha~ nah..with frens oso fun ma.. yea depends who u r with..with the rigth person..everywhere is fun! Got back home round 10..we took Taxi..coz i damn beh tahan d..so sleepy..and sory to kalyn and lishan dat i cancled the meeting jus now..coz i was damn tired n nid to do presentation powerpoint summore..so yea.. sorry ^^

housemate apologized to me coz she knew i was freakin bored the whole night long.. haha~ but its ok..she actualy tel me not to hate Eastcoast bcoz of ysterday.. haha~ i wont..coz i belief its a nice place.. i wud love to go there n cycle again prehaps skate too!! cant wait til my brunei frens come..will bring them there..to relax! ^^

Slept from 10am til 3.30pm..damn hungry.. haha~ took my dinner round 5 and try to find info for my presentation..and yea.. ended up chatting again.. hehe had a long funny chat with mr.him today.. and yea.. it was fun..thanks to him.. cheer my day..

and now..i suddenly duno wat to write..haha..i can only feel one thing..that is.. im hungry!! its 12.43am..i am hungry.. i want satay!! >.<

nites people..upload pics later..coz today network not so good.. muacks!! satay here i come..

2008-01-03T22:47:00.000+08:00

im here to upload the pics during xmas!! ^^ i had a great time..and yea i learnt some new games.. *tiu tiu tiu* haha~

WeiLing and Me..

spot miee!!

under da big tree.. the 1st spot where we carol! ^^

^^ dey are great!

wat a pose..

the person dat i spent my nite with..

random..

^^ my 1st xmas in SG!!

2008-01-03T22:29:00.000+08:00

CANCER-SWEET TALKER
(6/22-7/22)
Trustworthy. Attractive. Great kisser.
One of a kind. Loves being In long-
term relationships. Extremely
energetic. Unpredictable. Will exceed
your expectations. Not a Fighter, But
will Knock your lights out..

its so true.. haha~ love being in long-term relationgship! ^^

was so emo last nite..and yea i gues im feeling abit better now..at least i made up my mind stick to the same presentation! dun care liao!! haha~ i felt bad coz i skipped half of the class today..and arh.. tcher actualy check the attendance again..and so mine is cancled!! T.T my bad..

booked the ticket back to Brunei on 5th feb ^^ CNY!! haha~ i mish home!! Aunt called and Cousin called too..i know they care~ hehe.. and yea..i seriously miss brunei!! miss all my frens.. and thanks souwei..im sorry for being so childish b4.. i love u guys back in brunei! try to love me more oso k? dun act cool pls!! *blekz*

i cant blief many ppl are joinin us to Kukup Island! yeayness!! ^^ Linda, Kalyn!! hehe..cant wait for dat day.. sure take lots of pics!!

called daddy and koko~ hehe..love dem both..and yea..thinkin to join california fitness~ but well..will see.. mayb just a month to try 1st.. ^^ if interested den join long term lo..so ex lei.. bo lui lar! had so much fun talkin to papa over da net.. hehe~ he is sooo cute! love u pa.. and yea..our bet!! 3 months 3 kgs to win a ticket to Taiwan!! hahaha~ *yeayness* i must work hard ei..

Orite..wanna start collectin info for my powerpoint..nites! ^^ have a great day..

im once disapointed again.. or mayb i shud jus turn and walk away silently...

2008-01-02T21:17:00.000+08:00

wat an EMO post.. EMO-ing~

with all the resolutions i listed..i hope i can achieve dem...i really do~ having all the times by urself isnt as good as u thought..

just finishin doin my assignment..and reading through my answer..it soo..arh~nvm..im too tired to think.. and kinda disapointed bout sumone..mayb im thinkin too much or mayb we r both too tired.. i dunno..

always telling myself to look at the world on a brighter side..but im abit too tired to cheer myself up now..arh! school works loading.. the one im very sick bout is my presentation..arh..finaly came up with one topic and darn a group presented sumthing quite similar..so in other words, i have to redo my presentaion!! have to find another topic!! findin topic iisss sooo not easy and im doin this all alone..arh *sobs* anyone hav any great idea to suggest? the theme is EMERGING TECHNOLOGIES!

arh..who r there to cheer me up?? i need lame jokes! i just wanna smile!! STRESS SIA! so looking forward to da dance class today but end up cancled..omg! so sick of cancling the clas lei.. i wanna dance! i wanna exercise!!

sorry people..am being so emo.. now im feeling better.. *forcing a smile on the face* hehe.. i wanna sleep soon..headache! hope tomorrow is a better day and hope i can settle down with a topic soon! i need a topic...

thanks to shan and kalyn being there with me.. am looking forward to shoppin with u both..dinner together! ^^ i wan weekend!! i wanna settle my presentation.. arh.. i can do it! kerren jiayou! brain block now..dun wanna tink..

hope tomorrow will be a better day.. more better days to come.. please!!

time to bed.. nites~

2008-01-01T19:05:00.001+08:00

its 2008...

wat am i happy bout my 2007..
many wishes came true on 2007 and im loving it..

<3 Happiness of 07 <3
-Met JayChou!
-Went to TVXQ concert..
-Studyin in SG
-Met many great people.. venus..kayln..shan..many more..
-Back to great frens with Chieh and Ting and Sien ^^ dats really a great thing..im
happy bout that!
-Staying with a great family in Singapore!
-Joined dance class both at school and outside..
-have great DA SAU!! love da sau lots~ and ofcoz da sau family..all great people!
-Know how much daddy and koko loves me eventho im here in SG..
-Learn to live on my own..
-Spent more money den usual..and im tryin to control!! haha~
-Learn to be strong..knowin that people owes leave us suddenly..
-

=X no no 2007 =X
-Leave family and stand up alone in Singapore
-Leave my brunei friens..i miss u all..
-Loneliness
-Emptiness
-No he??!! *arrrhhh...big problem...haha*
-Not much close frens yet.. *who wanna accompany me watch movie..*
-The girl that came with me to SG..leave me after 6mths..Wansing,i mish u!
-I miss basketball!!
-Sleeping late
-Getting up late
-Owes procastinate
-Lazy-ness

my new year resolutions... ^^

wanna hav a brand new me..and yea, i know its not easy! i will try my best.. i wanna diet!! haha.. no food for 3 months!! den wil b damn sexy.. haha~ hotness!! *Faint* im goin insane..its 2am in the morning and yea, i jus finished doin my assignments!

My wishlist! mah resolutions..
-Be a better me..
-Love papa more!!
-Spend less! Eat less!
-Diet.. wanna drop 10kgs..can? i try! but must be healthy *noddin mah head*
-Get to know more people.. more places..
-Meet a mr.niceguy!
-Stay healthy
-Wan everyone around me just stay around me.. dont leave can?? *begging*
-JayChou's concert!! not so possible since tickets are all sold out! *cry*
-Visit more places..
-Money money come come..

arh..am i hoping for too much? hehe~ but im happy with wat i am now..jus tryin very much to improve..be a better girl ^^ hope 2008 is a better year!!

2008-01-01T15:23:00.000+08:00

the last day of 07..

im glad that i have Kalyn with me ^^ love u dear.. u and shan realli bring miracles to my life *village gal sounds so lonely here* haha~ i love u both lots lots lei.. <3

waited Kalyn at Starbucks til 10pm..den we went to this tented-club outside cathay.. not much fun tho.. and hang here hang there.. its 12am~ haha.. happy new year..we hugged each other.. ^^

lost in the disco light..

mr.tan, kerren, kalyn and melt candy floss..

our 1st 08 explore..
hehe.. we went to korek drainage and we found $50!! omg!! ><

den we both went outram ktv and met up with my housemate and his frens ^^ yeayness!! sing sing sing..sing all the way til 3am!!

cam fever dat nite! ^^

she ask me y..and i answered y too.. lol~

we arent drunk.. hehe~ we r sure we arent..not until 7am!

after ktv..we went..oh..walked all the way to central from pearl centrel with heeellllsss!!! pian man!! =S NO HEELS FOR LONG DISTANCE coz its like HELL!!

haha..
but i had fun all the way.. holding hands and singing watever songs with kayln! i love her!! ^^ and arh..darn no taxiiii.. i mean lots of taxiii but all BUSY! damn jia lat.. waited for mayb an hour?!! sat at the road side like siau lang..but nvm..cam fever again.. *as usual*

i love this girl..

i hope she loves mie too..

roadside kids..

and yea..our dad own da road!

reached home round 4.30am..den we went to seveneleven buy sum drinks with da $50.. hehe, had some prawn mee, snacks and ba cho mee!! haha~ foooddd!! and watched this dunno wat crocodile film in Ivan's room..honestly we didnt pay much attention to the show..we talked throughout the show..and arrr..the show kinda sucks..oni one spot! walau.. haha~ anyway we had fun till 7am~

dats how my lovely new year begins! ^^ its gona be a great year!! orite..its time to think of wat to add in my wish list! hehe~ wanna go for a nap 1st.. slept at 7am jus not..den woke at 11am.. arh...tired!

appiee new year...

2008-01-01T14:06:00.000+08:00

yeappi.. its 2008!!

new year, new me!!

orite..shud i post bout da past?? okie..lets recall back da sweet times along with pics..

post pics of xmas ^^

gingerbreadman

santa lost in MDIS!!

its great to have Sandy here for xmas.. eventho we din get to countdown together.. XD

dats wat made da xmas here so unique!

meeting new frens! ^^ great time photo taking~

its a blue blue xmas~

okiee.. talking bout xmas.. hav to thanks to lishan for taking me to this carol thingy..it was so fun! ^^ will upload more pics when i got them from wei ling ^^ i had a great night at bowen's house too.. thanks shan..love u.. muacks! u bring great people into my life!!

dats how meal is like when u r alone..

day out with housemate.. thanks june!! ^^

da recall of sweet sweet memories.. ^^

2007-12-15T23:58:00.000+08:00

happie birthday Wansing!
haha, its 11.58am.. 2 more mins..

Spent da whole evening doin mah blog layout.. changed a few pics n put in more details bout myself.. hehe~ ^^ am feeling so tired now.. gona sleep soon..

waiting for da Dance competition clip from my Sau Sau.. ^^ love her so much.. hehe~ she actualy recorded them using camera n phone! arh.. so touching.. my koko n papa wil never do dat.. haaha! Wawa too, she recorded it into tape.. so sweet la u all.. i feel so being loved by u all..*blush*

Am back in Singapore now.. when i first got down from da taxi.. i hav a very strong feeling telin myself dat i MISS BRUNEI! arh..i realli do.. Thanks god when i got home, i wasnt alone.. June was around.. but she went out for dinner..so yea, i was alone at home.. had mc spicy for my dinner.. lonely sia.. haha~ but i have to learn to be strong! ^^ and im glad dat i din cry when wansing sent me off juz now.. hehe..

had a great day in Miri last Thurs! its totally awesome! i was drunk~ ahaha, was i? ^^ they said so.. haha.. da food was way better than Brunei's.. was a bit depressed coz i couldnt make it on da stage, singing.. arh.. they kept teling me to go up stage.. its not that i dun wan.. but i hav no voice.. how m i gona sing like dat? i kept asking myself.. am i taking no voice as an excuse? issit that im not daring enuf to go up stage? arh!! whose wedding comin nex? i sing! haha~ i hope i dare! *pray hard*

arh.. not forgetting.. happy birthday dear Xiah! ^^ Love him lots~ da guy with the voice of an angle! dolphin boy! <3

im feeling abit of headache now.. arh.. guess i better continue bloggin tmr.. with pics! show u how crazy we were dat nite! haha! ^^

muacks..nites!

~

2007-12-11T14:59:00.000+08:00

i dunno y.. dont i hav d passion to blog? arh~~ i hate myself for procastinating works! tonnes and tonnes of works pilling up.. and im still putting works behind.. everything seems so packed recently.. dont even hav time to breath!

Back in Brunei on da 1st of Dec,
was surprised to meet Peiyi in brunei's airport.. had some chat with her.. its been so long.. nah not realli tho.. but its been long that we didnt chat privately.. hehe~ m happy to hear that she and her love one is still so sweet ^^ i wonder when will i meet mine? haha.. feel so stupid sumtimes why do i concern so much bout this.. ouch.. im 18 liao.. but still single and available.. sigh..so sad..haha~ ^^ cheer up.. i owes comfort myself.. its not the rite time yet.. haha~ i hope its true!

Went to ChungHwa's dinner at nite.. was so concern who wud i be sitting with.. and im glad that i saw Chia chi there.. i sat bside him ^^ thanks god we r on the same table.. afraid that i mite end up sitting with uncles and aunties~ ahaha..main purpose there was to see Yeon's dance.. hehe.. and was kinda touched when i heard those school kids singing a song..i forgotten the tittle.. but i could feel tears in my eyes.. time flies.. its been 18 years.. my primary school..where everything begins.. thanks to all teachers! without u all.. we wont end up being good persons!

3rd dec,
its my koko's big day!! ^^ hehe.. i have got a da sau!! yeay~ loves them both!! hehe.. had fun dat day.. the games they played.. funny!!shall upload some funny pics..haha..but afraid my koko's heng tai will chop me up! haha~ love the kisses game..so funny sia.. hehe.. m looking forward to see the video! guys kissing..omg! haha~ dont imagine!! its a tiring day indeed.. but we all had fun~

there are frens that i wanna treasure and there r those i just dont wanna care..but why did u make those i wanna treasure to become those i dont wanna care? i dont want.. but seems like everything couldnt be the same anymore.. what we were at this time last year..and what it is now.. is totally different.. we used to be so close..and at this time last year.. we had so much fun sleepin over n walking here n there.. guess like wat u all used to say.. "siewlin, this is the last time we walk to ur house ni.." and it actualy happened to b the last.. coz we could never go back to what we used to be.. i tried so hard to treasure.. telling myself not to let go.. but seems like its difficult.. the longer i hold on, the more i feel the pain.. and now i guess i juz cant tolerate anymore.. i actually let go...

and sumtimes i think mayb letting go is the rite choice.. there is this one person which i let go..and now i can see that he is very happy.. u might not know how much pain it takes me to let u go.. i want to be frens but i know u wan more than that.. i know i had to make the choice.. to let u stay beside me or to let u go.. and i chose to let u go.. i dont wanna be selfish.. when i heard that u actualy said im playing u, my heart broke into pieces.. and i know..the decision i made had turned us into strangers.. u must be thinking me as a devil.. i hav no choice.. i chose to tell u the truth and let u go.. u left me pains.. and i m glad dat u live a better live now.. accidentaly bumped into u n her in the shopping mall, i didnt know if u saw me.. when i saw the smile on ur face.. the way u look at her.. i knew that i had made the rite choice.. to make the others happy, one has to sacrifice.. i had nothing much left to say.. but i wish u all the best!! how i wish we could still be friends.. but i know it sounds very impossible now.. im sorry if i ever hurt u.. but i just want to let u know that i dont mean to..and i dont blame u for hating me.. mayb i jus deserve that..

when i look back now.. i seriously hav not much frens.. i feel sad bout myself.. how come a friendly carrot ended facing back to the world.. used to have so much frens.. and now i feel myself not so socialise.. i dunno y.. maybe i nid time.. i dunno.. when i think back, im abit afraid.. i gues im havin personal problem here.. why do frens all walk away from me.. i ask myself, will i end up alone at the end? i dunno.. im afraid to know it myself..

8th dec,
my bro's wedding dinner ^^ it was a great nite.. great musics, great dj, great food? nah.. soso~ haha.. everything was fine.. will upload some pics if i remember ^^ i hav a great da sau! hehe~

me n my cuzzie.. i love her!

2007-11-30T10:32:00.000+08:00

I see Hyori's shades!! ^^ hehe.. had a great time in KL.. Thanks peeps! i love u all..and we all love TVXQ!! their concert roxx~ ^^

opps.. too much pics! haha..thats all for now.. cuming up more pics ! ^^ goin out soon..so take care peeps! muacks.. hope my pics cheer ur day.. haha.. if hav caption im sure it looks more funny..esp the lee hyori ones! haha.. the sunglasses!! haha

2007-11-29T22:12:00.000+08:00

Again..im sorry for the very late post! ^^

Let me cast my mind back to last week..its been a tiring but sweet week! ^^ had so much fun and so spent alot too!! haha..well, its not as much as i thought i guess..coz i din really buy much in KL.. too much to buy so end up not buying much.. u trust me? haha~

Had days with my aunt,uncle,cuzziez (Leh and Girl) in Johore! Its not the shopping that inspire me the most..its the fun i had chatting with them! i realli love them! they brought so much joys to my life.. back in my childhood life.. now..and i believe more in the future! thanks to my dear Aunt and Uncle! ^^ Had a long chat with Aunt dat day.. so much memories i had with them when i was young.. spent most of my weekend at their place..goin to swimming pool..den after the exhausting swim, we wud go to this fast food outlet in mabohai..hehe~ sumtimes we wud even go to da beach..den Aunt wud prepare sandwhiches and some other food.. its so sweet of her.. ^^ i will never forget those moment i had.. i remember talking bout this to ahbi too..and yea..he said time flies.. in a blink of an eye..its been 10 years.. we are all grown up now..well expect that cute little ah girl who is still so innocent! hehe.. more and more memories to be made together! ^^ no matter what happen, we shall owes remember that we r family! forever!!

The days in KL

Reached there around 9? den took a straight bus to KL Sentral to meet up with Venus dongseng! and yea.. im glad that i had her with me as my tour guide! hehe..
we had so much fun together..well didnt do much shopping but spent most of our time taking neoprints! opps, cant deny that we are camwhore!! yea..we are! ^^ cant believe that we actually took 3 times in a days! omg!! haha.. Had some chat when havin lunch with dongseng too..hehe, im reali glad that she is there with me..
KL isnt as bad as i thought except the fact that most of the taxi drivers arent chinese.. opps..aint racist!! haha.. Went to timesquare den Sungei Wang with dongseng..after taking lots n lots of neoprints, we went to Sunway Pyramid to meet up with Angela and Angelina! Had drinks and short chat in Starbucks.. wow, we actually gossipin bout da 'auntie'.. haha, my bad!! den we started talking bout Dongbang, den Wuchun? den.. i dunno.. haha oh yea, singing competition? aww.. i wanna try Astro Talent Quest but i seriously will chicken out in last minute.. haha~ am realli glad to meet up with Ms. meow meow too! she is such a nice person!After meeting her, we went for some shoppin and yea..cam whoring! haha.. thats after venus had left.. omg! u wont believe that i actualy stand bside those doll models acting like a model myself.. den climb up this kid's ride, as if it fits me! haha~ will upload da pics when i get it from Angelina.. haha.. i still remember seeing them laughin at me posing there.. ^^ we had so much fun..bought a necklace den a sunglasses.. arh..wanted to buy sunglasses for very long d but i know i hardly use so i dun buy..but that day duno y this Angela ah..keep saying i look like Lee Hyori
haha..so ah i end up buyin the sunglasses.. thanks to Angela lor!! haha~ didnt get the cap eventho she keep persuing me to buy.. hehe~ u know y i dun get the cap not? coz if i put on it ah..more like hyori la.. later many reportes follow me how? haha.. Hyori going to Dongbang Msia concert.. haha! think tooo much sia~ had sushi at night with Mel, angela and lina hehe we ate alot! and yea.. its nice!! nyaman.. all the nice pics will be posting up soon.. lazy la now..hehe.. having sore throat!!

26th nov,

its the big big day.. its Dongbang concert!! omg!! haha~ cant believe that i can actually see them performing in live.. omg! dream come true!! both seeing Jay and Tvxq are my great dreams..and yea..they came true!! ^^ hehe..thanks papa.. without him approving..i wont be having so much fun here.. i love u papa.. Had a panadol extra before getting off to the concert coz i wasnt feeling so well.. once reached there i met up with Venus dongseng.. hehe den we went in for the concert..yea.. sneaked in our camera-es too.. haha~ couldnt believe that we were just beside
the stage..aww..realli hav to thanks to meow meow for the nice spot we had! ^^ the concert was sooo high! we all sang along the songs..and most of the fans were having great coorporation! thats really great.. my 1st time goin to a concert!! its for Dongbang!! ^^ cant believe that i could see them so close well except Micky who didnt come to our place..so sad lar.. the one i love most..ouch! hurts~ haha..but well nvm.. i know he is cute! thats enough.. hehe, the video they showing was sooo lovely and funny.. especially my wipper chunnie..with that, i forgive him
for not coming to our place.. and i believe we stil hav the chance to meet.. must have faith! ^^ hehe..

Jaejoong's impression for me was that he is skinny.. yea.. and his jelly fish dance was funny!! haha~ we actually saw him doing it live!! haha~ omg~ and he splashed his water towards us.. i had them on my face!! haha~ if its Micky's mayb i wud not wash my face..haha but its JJ's! haha.. and Joongie oso give me this perfect complex feeling..aww.. the face is like soo doll-like.. hehe~ perfect complexion sia~.. den

Changmin.. hmm.. 1st thing i must say.. he is SHY!! haha i mean it.. can see him blushing! haha~ now u can imagine how shy he really is!! haha~ den he is tall.. yea.. skinny too..!

Yuhno.. had him at our side for just a while but well..i can tell he had this perfect man look! and yea.. kinda skinny too.. arh..where all ur meat gone? must be too tired.. heard that he wasnt feeling so well that day that he stood at the back not dancing with his mates for some songs! but well..its still good! hehe..

den Junsu! omg!! he issss sooooooo CUUUTTTEEE!! hahah.. had him at our side for the longest..and yea most important.. the cute balloon song.. he and his cute little wheel car? haha.. sooo cute lar!! his expression..omo.. killed all of us... haha~ he even did this flying kiss expression..omg!! i olmost faint too.. haha~ i guesshe has the best interaction with fans~ he is soo cute!! haha~ i could never forget.. he was the closest to us.. hehe

Chunnie..arh sad he din come to our side.. i kept shouting but useless..
never i know he wants us to come for next concert thats y he dun wanna come close to us in this concert..haha! yea.. im trying to look at it from another point of view.. just to comfort myself..haha.. he is cute too lar!! especially in the video..i couldnt stop laughin.. oh my god!! the wipper boy..and the ass shaking! CHUNNIE <3LOVE YOU LOTS <3 KERREN .. haha Venus loves u too chunnie..
Chunnie showed us his sexy nipples and ribs.. kakaka~ and love him in pink too~ so cute during balloon performance!! ^^ We were so close..all in a stadium.. yet so far that i couldnt see u clearly..

but i m sure that..one day..we will~ as long as we all believe in faith.. it will bring us all together! Dongbang=LOVE! hehe.. had so much fun..shouting here n there.. encore was great too..and eventho most of us coulndt understand wat Micky was trying to say..but yea.. he did make us high too at last~ hehe..and his cute bye bye.. hehe~ and chunnie and joongie with a balloon in the middle..both using stomach to push the balloon so that it burst.. hehe~ so cute sia~ and after the concert..me and venus actually tried it! haha~ love the moment..

oh yea, thanks to Melissa's cousin's mummie too.. hehe~ thanks for the drive and thanks for the supper! ^^

had fever the second day tho after the concert..haha~ too high and tired d.. had morning flight..so yea..kinda rushing..but well thanks for everything..those who were around me helping out.. u all were the angels send by god to guide me..thanks.. love u all lots! and thanks Dongbang for the great performance! i miss not seeing the dancer that i wanted to meet.. haha~ hope there wil be another chance.. there sure will.. Dongbang will remain.. i believe that~ ^^ if not..sm..u know what fans wil do.. haha~ without Venus, Angela, Angelina and Melissa.. i dont think my trip will be so fun and wonderful.. thanks for being there.. i love u all!

stayed over at Johore on Sunday night coz was having fever..thanks Aunt for the care..and uncle too! hehe~ i felt so warmth inside..^^

arh..its so long..later kena complain again.. haha~ will write more again with more pics coming up in the next post.. hehe~ ^^ annyong! Dongbang=Love

2007-11-20T18:31:00.000+08:00

bloggie!!

i have been wanted to blog since last week but i never hav the time to.. im sorry.. well.. its been a week since i got back to singapore.. and i realli struggle troughout this whole week.. the feeling of being alone realli sucks!! and im glad that i have people who cares about me.. special thanks to lishan...and aww i reali mish kayln.. im glad that i met her! ^^ hehe.. thanks to my housemate june for picking me up from the airport too..

arh..talkin bout airport, reminds me of this chicken man!! arh.. he looks 40+.. and kinda "CHI KO" which means pervert la.. hmm.. had him siting near me in d airplane.. the beginning chat was quite okie.. i tot its like those friendly chatting..sekali he asked me out for dinner dat nite..i din feel anything weird tho.. its oni until he said he wud bring me to this shopin mall..den can buy me camera or ipod..and bring me to dinner.. and he said "IF TIRED WE CAN REST TOO!! I HOPE U UNDERSTAND WAT I MEAN!" walau..wat he actually mean? scare me to death sia!! i kept quite after that.. thanks god that i had toothache that nite so when i reach hume after the flight i straight away sleep d.. forgotten to text him dat i wont b meeting him.. but my landlord told me not to text him or else he mite hav my number.. aww scary lar!!

went to dance practise the 2nd day..full of passion... but towards the end i felt so tired lar.. havin fever summore.. at 1 point i realli feel like giving up..but i know if i did den i wil disapoint all my dance mates..so i know i cant.. no matter how tired i am..i have to struggle tru it.. having hamzah yelling at us..drilling at our steps make me even more discouraged to perform..but i know i can do it!! and thanks god..today's performance was kinda okie.. juz abit messy.. hehe im sure we can do better on da 28th! ^^

am now in Johor with my aunt..and wil b goin to KL for DBSK's concert n meeting venus.. i cant wait.. hehe~ yeay..a week of stress is over..and now i can realli enjoy! people.. no pain no gain!! ^^ hehe..

2007-11-13T01:06:00.000+08:00

happy birthday my dear lishan! ^^ sorry dat i cant b there to celebrate with u.. but i love u! i reali do~ ^^ without u in Singapore, my life wont be so colourful.. the shopping, eating, trying out clothes in the fitting rooms, cam-whoring, dancing.. we juz had so much fun together..and thats not the end..its just the begining! ^^ hehe.. thanks so much.. im glad that i met u.. not forgeting Kayln too.. love u gurls~ hehe..eventho u ppl owes bully me like im a village girl..hehe~ but i stil love u all.. muacks~

its been a tiring day..not feeling so well ysterday.. had fever n flu.. and thanks god im feeling abit better now..just dat i feel like vomitin after eating the med.. i guess the med not suitable for me..arh.. hate this feeling..when u wanna puke but u cant..aww~

haD FUN painting with cheeboon and mayyer juz now.. ^^ hehe, nvr tot i can actually paint.. hehe~ den went to play basketball.. had fun too coz no seniors playing today..we had the court for ourselves today..hehe~ had fun playing with those juniors~ all the laughters.. hehe~ we juz cant play seriously.. after day went dinner with frens at easyway..hehe~ its been so long since we all last sit together and talked.. love the moment.. ^^ hope there will always be another day for this.. hehe~ and all the photoes we taken at OG's entrance.. feel like a jerk..but well who cares? hehe we juz lov doing it eventho ppl might b laughin at us.. hehe~ posing like ah beng summore.. opps~ haha..after dat went beach with a few frens.. hehe~ we talked so much there.. sharing our toughts and stuffs~ hehe ^^ and the wind blowing towards us.. the breeze.. juz love dat moment.. we shud do dat more often..hanging out hehe~ ^^ love u peeps~ m leaving soon..but well its oni 2 weeks den i wil be back.. hehe~

had some probs about my msia trip juz now..arh.. wont be stopin by penang instead i wil fly straight to kl..thanks everyone for caring and concernin bout my accomodation.. and thanks Angela n Angelina n Venus for the plan.. hehe~ guess its gona be fun.. reali thanks.. for everything.. hope we wil hav fun there in kl together.. ^^ cant wait to meet u all and shop and ice skating!! hahaha~ finally everything is settled..all i nid to do now is to settle my air ticket den avting done =) hehe.. TVXQ, here we come!!

am feeling so much better today.. i love all my frends!! im sorry if i ever do sumting wrong..im sorry.. but i realli do love u all~ u all bring so much joys to my life..and im sorry for my selfish-ness~ i will be the natural me again~ hehe if taking advantage of me made ur life for easier..i wont mind to lend u my hand~ helpin each other out is wat frens are for! ^^ im sorry for those i ever tot of taking advantages of me..and those i tried to avoid..im sorry.. i wil be the normal me again..trying to make ppl around me happy ^^ just dont over do it k ppl..hehe~ i need love from u all too lei.. XD muacks~

2007-11-12T02:10:00.000+08:00

err... i feel down..

sorry i owes blog when i feel down..arh.. pass few days din blog..so u know how happy i were.. haha~ i was chattin with a friend just now..and the way he responded made me feel as if im kinda annoying..aww~ n i think back..i gues i was annoying at times.. dunno people much but pretend to be like very close.. eww~ i think back bout it.. i feel sucks too~ sorry la..kinda emosi.. tryin much to relax...but arh.. it jus keep remindin me dat yea..i do sumtimes to dat to a few not so close frens which i pretend to be close.. nah its just the feeling they gave me were as if we were close..but well inside them actualy think im mayb jus a jerk.. i've learnt today that maybe i should be so playful with people i dont really know.. they might fed up with my jokes or maybe it just wasnt the right time to joke..especially its round da mid nite.. billion of apologizes if i ever did it to anyone of u out there~ i owes tot im sumone to that person but they sumhow owes remind me dat im not.. yea i gues u r rite..i shouldnt have always tought myself as so important to others which in fact im not..

thanks to those around me who take me as real friends.. im happy dat im part of ur life..that im there for u to tell ur stories too.. i dont mean to b busy body but dat made me feel dat im somebody to u.. that u can depend on me.. n thanks to those who r owes there to cheer me up..pull me up when i fall.. and yea i know sum of u might think i should learn to stand up myself..ok im learning.. i dont depend much on ppl around me..coz i know..one day they might turn their back to me too.. that wil oni hurt me more..once there is a sign of them takin advantage of me..i will move away slowly.. i know i mite b thinkin too much.. i shud hav live life happily nt thinkin so much.. if takin advantage of me wil make ur life easier n happier.. y not? or issit dat im so selfish dat i hate ppl takin adv of me n me nt takin any in return? arh i dunno.. i realli dont..

arh.. better dun talk bout sad stuffs again.. dun wanna end my day with sorrows again..

had fun ysterday stayin over at sista's house eventho i was a lil bit fever.. went for class reunion today and was kinda happy too.. played around with da cake..haha~ cant believe dat me n yuh just had a cake fight at jolibee.. haha~ dats so daring of us.. hehe ^^ peeps~ will mish u all when im back in Singapore~

Frens come n go..but remember only true friends left their footprints.. i hope i found mine at ur heart too..

2007-11-05T16:34:00.001+08:00

To my roommate,

That day i was surprised when u told me that u gona quit MDIS, i thought u gona go for Poly..i was even more surprised when u told me that u goin to Australia.. i was like.. omg.. are u serious? and u said its confirmed.. i was stunned.. totally no idea that u gona leave me so early.. the news come to me so sudden that i thought u were kidding.. coz u have never told me bout goin to aussie at all b4.. the feeling is like.. arh.. i dunno.. it seems like im not a good roommate.. nah.. gues it just bcoz u made the decision when u r back in brunei thats y u dun hav the chance to tell me b4 its confirmed.. anyway.. wish u all the best there~ u have made the choice and yes it is the right choice!! dun think too much ^^ u have explore half of SG and now u hav the chance to explore Aussie.. hehe u r lucky ^^

i decided not to post this till u leave.. coz i dun wan u to feel sad b4 leaving.. u r leaving for a better future.. and we sure wil mis u.. the classmates wil sure miss ur notes!! hehe.. eventho its oni 6months.. but im realli thankful for u being there with me..

the first time we all had together,
first time studying overseas..
first time having frens sending us off the airport..
first time living on our own..
first time meeting so many international friends..
first time taking public transport to school..
first time going late to class.. IT CLASS.. remember we went in from back door..haha
first time going to karaoke..
first time exploring all the buffet places
first time staying together..
first time staying up late to finish our assignment..
first time betting on our exams questions which we lost the bet..
first time paying $12 for 4 ppl buffet.. indian buffet
first time so addicted to starbucks!
first time

there were a lot of first time we had together.. eventho u r leaving soon.. but i m sure this wil not be the end of our friendship.. its just an end for our roomate-ship.. haha watever it is.. hehe~ i never thought u wil be the first to leave our sg home.. i guess everyone at home wil be surprised too.. especially Hooisiang jie jie.. we havent even go to karaoke with her.. we had so much plan in list..

Things that are not done..
going to settler bar
going to karaoke with family
going to Tioman island with family
going to little india
going to the court
going to teddy muzeum
waiting for me outside the club?? i thought im goin to clubbin..

I really appreciate u by my side.. thanks~ im sorry that i might not be so direct somtimes.. i didnt tell my appeciation infront of u..coz u know.. its kinda shy to say these words..and i dun wanna cry..u know i will..i cant imagine living on my own here in singapore.. but well i have to learn to be strong ^^ nothing is forever~ we have to learn to be independent.. i just wanna thank you for everything.. for the dished that u wash..for the meals that u cook..for the accompany that i asked for when im feeling down..for listening to my probs..for the laughters that we had on my lame jokes..for the tears we shed when we were first here and during the family steambot dinner..for the opinions u gave on my dress and stuffs, u know making decisions are difficult for me..for the photos that u made me look great in..for the vitamin c u offered when im not feeling well..for the patience u had on me..

and im sorry if i have ever done somthing that hurt ur feeling.. im sure i had..im sorry~ sorry for what i said when i was not in the mood.. sorry if i have overspent and never think bout ur feelings like wat auntie melia said.. im sorry~ sorry for calling u to eat supper..i know u gained weight probably bcoz of that..im grateful for u being there.. i hope everything wil be fine for u in Aussie~ all the best.. and take care when u r there.. im sure u wil meet lot great frens and even better roommate~ hugs! i mish u.. bright future infront of u.. dun turn back.. let them remain memories in our heart.. sweet memories..

2007-11-05T16:24:00.000+08:00

APOLOGIES!!

Im sorry.. i really am.. for what i have written in my previous post.. im sorry.. i read through it.. and i dont mean to be so mean..arh~~ no.. im not that lonely like wat u pictured.. nono.. its slightly better than wat u thought.. haha~ slightly? opps~.. nah.. im just kidding.. its not as bad as u thought.. its just.. that day i was kinda emotional..so yea.. u know girl~

Well, eventhough i hav not much time with my frens..but luckily i stil have my family.. i feel close with them.. so frens..dun be sorry.. im sorry for wat i hav written.. im glad that u all always come to me once u are free.. i know u guys are havin exams.. so i dun blame u.. no i reali dont.. coz i know we gona stick together again once the exams is over.. im looking forward to it.. ^^ i love u guys.. i know u care.. i realli do~

its few days more.. u guys wil be free from exams! ^^ im happy.. hehe~ and counting down.. its 9more days til im back to Singapore?? arh.. now i feel sad of goin back so early.. the feeling is so ironic..i know.. arh~

recently..sumting happened.. i feel kinda down.. but well.. i wil tell when its time.. i thought i wil be fine..but i guess i need time..

2007-10-29T15:05:00.000+08:00

Cancer
Be as expressive as you can today -- unleash your inner emotions without hesitation.

thats wat my horoscope wants me to do.. thats y i express them all out!! arh.. hope im feeling better.. its 29oct now..

2 more weeks den im back in Singapore.. den i wil go explore Malaysia..arh~cant wait for da trip..at least i hope it wont be bored and i wont be alone.. realli hate being alone..

till den..

2007-10-29T14:20:00.000+08:00

arh.. who can help me?? m feeling so blank inside.. so bored.. nothing to do.. arh, never expected coming back brunei wil be like this.. tot m gona be damn busy with frens.. but well.. it doesnt seems that way.. arh.. kinda hate this feeling.. like no aim.. nothing to do.. arh~

what i dislike here?? no public transport!! i wan go bandar kia kia also canot.. sigh~~ so sad sia.. what i do avday? wake up.. eat..den sleep.. watch tv.. duh~ sien lei!! sick of it liaw..

wanna dance.. wanna shop.. wanna drink starbucks.. wanna limteh with frens.. wanna hang out.. sigh~~ im sorry but i have to say i miss singapore!! eventho there might b no one with me too.. but i duno la.. sick of being alone!! its so meaningless la sumtimes.. whats holidays?? to relax.. yea, i have enough of it.. haha i start to miss lectures!! at least, i hav sumting to do instead..

my body is aching all over.. duno y.. feel so weak.. bored! sigh~ sorry lar blog.. with all this rubbish i post here.. am realli sick of being alone.. no where to tell out..so yea.. take u as the victim..

err..i duno but i hope im feeling better now.. i wanna go excapade!! i wanna swim in empire!! i wanna watch movie in mall~ i wan popcorn!! ouch.. pun sia sia~ i wanna watch bball tourney.. arh!!! it wud b great if onli i know how to drive.. sigh~

2007-10-24T20:43:00.000+08:00

its been few days.. i went to Miri thats y cant blog.. ^^ omg, am really addicted to blog now.. dunno y.. maybe bcoz i dun hav anyone to talk to... well frens are busy preparing for their upcoming exams..so spent most of my time with family for the last few days..

went to da skin specialist for my hand prob.. was damn scared at 1st coz when the doctor look at my hand, his expression kinda serious..den he ask for my urine test..aww..i was like.. *omg, is it dat serious?* my heard pounded so fast.. my dad keep telling me that avting wil be fine and that even if there is any prob..the doctor wil offer me medication... no worries.. arh. what can i do? i seriously know dat im very chicken in this type of stuffs.. m afraid of doctors!! medicines!! ambulance!! and hospitals!! omg!! after geting my unirinalysis, the doctor said its normal.. phew~ thanks god! he just said that my skin prob is kinda serious so i hav reali take good care of it.. and no milk, egg, prawn and crad for 3 months!! *cry* i must obey since i dun wan the disease to come back again.. so ppl, do not offer me those 4 kinds of food k?? haha~

i dunno is it the med or wat..coz im feeling nt so well now.. feel dat my body is so weak..and feel like vomitin all the time.. omg! i gues must be the med lor.. my body is tryin to adjust to it..

orite.. let me end up with few pics taken back in brunei ^^ will continue another post later if i hav time to.. coz i feel like bloggin..but well gona rest for a while first..

its all me and her..coz i love her!! ^^ JK JK JK! <3

thinkin to write another post.. but m reali nt feelin well now.. wil write tmr! ^^ nites~ hav a nice day ppl.. muacks~ i know u care, coz u read.. thanks~

2007-10-21T21:26:00.000+08:00

i try to smile.. but its so difficult~ why?? its so not true.. i thought we r more than just friends.. but i feel that we r less than frens..

its so not easy to find sumone who treat u better than u treat them.. i honestly feel this words r real.. so many people around.. more than half of them dun treat me as good as i treat them.. sigh~ and thats y im walking silently away from them sumtimes.. guess i feel better.. trying my best to treat u all so good.. but wat i get in return is oni 50%.. i feel veryy stupid sumtimes.. well u must be saying..nothing in this world is fair!

trying not to think bout that again..but sumtimes juz cant stand it.. feel so down.. so lonely sumtimes.. where r all those so called frens gone to?? yea, they oni come to u when they need u.. when u r down.. who knows? when u r bored..who knows? when u realli wanna watch that film..whose there with u?? when u feel like goin to this restaurant.. who can u call?? if u pay for them..everyone wil come lar! thats for sure!! i dunno y.. i suddenly feel so down.. hate this! whose there to care?? arh.. forget it!

watched Bernard's show juz now.. he is so humourous! haha~ made me laugh.. that lights up my day.. wat a bored sunday.. went to 2 houses with dady.. hari raya-ing! haha, he wanted to go more houses but i paiseh plus i wanna rush home for the show..so yea.. Uncle Bernie, u did a good job! keep it up!! ^^ im sure many ppl like u too~ kekeke~

im so much to say juz now.. but suddenly so blank.. arh~ time to rest my brain d.. hehe, nights people!! hope u enjoy Jay's latest mv!! ^^ a brand new him~ nice nice!! wil be goin to Miri tomorrow maybe.. hehe~ wont be bloggin for two days.. take care! im hungry.. omg!!! eating mee.. omg!! haha pig pig!!

Love is all around.. im not so sure..

2007-10-19T23:07:00.000+08:00

im finally back in Brunei! ^^ hehe.. can u imagine how i feel the day before i came back here.. hehe.. feel so good to be home! ^^ miss all my classmates, dancemates and housemates back in Singapore!

Time flies~ arh.. its already 19th now.. im goin back on 14th Nov!! Time is so packed here.. many stuffs to do..meeting frens, going here n there with family, meeting all mah teachers, playing basketball, limteh with frens.. man~ so much things to do in so short period.. hehe! ^^ i can do it!! wanna spend my time with everyone..

i know it sure feels good to be in love.. but so sad im not one of them.. arh~ people always say..this type of thing takes time one.. hmm,cant imagine a 18years old girl.. never paktoh for so long.. so sad~ haha! but luckily i have many frens around me.. at least i dun feel lonely (or i pretend not to be) Natasha - Single! the lyric sounds so true.. yet people dun hope to be so!! haha~ i believe one day it will happen.. im waiting..

wanted to write more.. but my body is very tired now.. getting up early tomorow dating with my daddy..hehe ^^ finally im dating him.. played basketball just now.. kinda fun! ^^

orite, its time to bed now.. nites people!! ^^

CHunnie's love is everywhere! Not forgetting Jay's *winks*

2007-10-19T23:05:00.000+08:00

haha..came across this cute lil video.. damn funny sia!! ^^

http://www.happeepill.com/cartoons/p2pteachers/teachers.htm

attention to all teachers out there.. haha~ im sure u feel very song if u can do that to ur students.. opps~ ^^ cold blooded!! haha!! ^^ very funny lar.. its a good idea to relieve ur stress ^^Enjoy

2007-09-23T02:23:00.000+08:00

Tvxq goin Malaysia in November.. oh my god! have to start saving now..

Spent my past few days with my daddy..love him so much..talked a lot with him.. ^^ today sent him to da airport..i was glad that i didnt feel sad..coz i can meet him again in Oct! ^^ yeay.. cant wait to go back Brunei..wonder hows everything there..

Miss the people, the place, the food..the pace of life there..so calm and so relaxing..

Got my Business Law ans Marketin result today..kinda ok lar.. wasnt as bad as i expected ^^ two more modules to go.. jiayou!! then i can go back to Brunei ^^ cant wait cant wait.. peeps..i miss u all lots!!

Did i just say i wanna start saving? haha~ i realli spent alot!! wanna get All bout Tvxq 2..which cost me like 79SG Dollar!! omg!! and Tvxq's Malaysia concert.. most ex goes to 500RM!! still thinking which seats to choose.. cant afford the most expensive one..its like.. dun feel good to spend so much of dad's money.. shud get the middle seats..den spend the others on gettin their Cds or shopping.. hhehe..spend money again!!

Its 3am now!! waiting for my download to finish.. its 99% now.. kekeke~ gona sleep soon.. this few days i slept kinda late.. oh my god..gona wake at 10am tomorrow.. meeting Lishan for dance lesson tomorrow..wonder where i get those energy to dance.. just love dancin and singin ^^

orite..time for me to go to bed.. blog when im free again.. ^^ have a nice day people.. muacks

Micky yoochun = shuai-ness!!! *faint*

2007-09-15T20:40:00.000+08:00

Have u ever wonder what realli is love?? Its not an easy question..everyone has different perception..and here is one story which i read and found it kinda true.. thats what love is.. u will not know until u lose it one day.. why not turn around and look at those people around u.. cherish them.. u will not know..what might happen tomorrow..

A student asks his teacher, “What is love?”

The teacher said, “In order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn that you see and come back to me. But there is a catch: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick.”

The student went to the field and goes to the first row, where he saw one big corn, but he wonders to himself….maybe there is a bigger one ahead. Walking forward and true to his thoughts he saw a bigger one. However he did not pick it, but thought to himself again: “Maybe there will be an even bigger one waiting for him.”

Later, when he had walked through more than half of the corn field, he started to realize that he corn was not as big as the previous ones he saw, and he knows that he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted it!!!! So he ended up going back to the teacher with empty hands.

The teacher then told him, “….this is love… you keep looking for a better one, but when later you realized it, you have already missed the person…..”

In love, one must always cherish those that one already possesses.

2007-07-30T23:36:00.000+08:00

blog!!!

know wat???

haha, i met Jay Chou today!! at Cathay!! ^^ Happy Happy~ never will i believe myself that i actually met him in person~ ehehe~ eventho not very close but its still close~ ^^ happy happy.. waited for an hour plus..then it started to drizzle.. arh~ got wet..den the rain stopped.. felt kinda stupid waiting under the rain.. but i tell myself..its ok, as long as i can meet Jay chou.. hmm, den it drizzled again..luckily for about 5mins only.. after 10mins plus, Jay Chou finally appeared!! with the main actress~

arh!! im so happy..i cant believe my eyes.. im seeing Jay Chou in person!! he looks so clean..ahaha, im abit weird..always use the word clean to describe people.. his skin looks so soft~ ^^ so fair.. not very tall tho.. looks very young!! arh.. looks more handsome than on Tv.. *faints*.. only managed to see him like 30seconds.. den he went up stage..cant really see him d coz too crowded.. but i can hear him talk..~ hehe..the actress also very pretty..^^

Jay is such a kind person..eventho he is a popular singer but he doesnt act like one..he just seems so friendly!! i love him even more now~ Jay Chou da best!! ^^ Heard him play paino *faint!*

arh..people, im havin slight headache now after waitin under the rain.. wil upload sum pics.. but not very clear tho.. hehe too excited d!! oh, i did take vids too..but too shaky..dun wanna hurt ur people's eyes.. hehe~

The Crowd

See the word? welcome Jay Chou to Cathay! ^^

We waited under the rain..

eventho its only a few secs.. but im so in love!! ^^

where the lovely piano sounds from..

2007-07-29T21:44:00.000+08:00

Life ahead is a long way to go..

Yesterday stayed at home the whole morning doing assignment with Wansing and Michael.. we finally have time to sit down properly and talk.. things kinda change a bit recently..but im sure we wil always stay together! sometimes we just need to give each other a break..

went to Indian restaurant again yesterday.. felt kind of awful coz i only paid $3! well, its a "pay as u like" buffet.. but i still feel bad.. sorry yer~ i promise if have rezeki, i will pay more next time..

What made yesterday a happy for me is that i actually challenged myself to walk home all the way from Chinatown to Redhill!! according to Mrt, its actually 4 stops..doesnt sound far.. but took us like 2hours??!! haha.. but its pretty fun.. and i was super hyper yesterday when walking home..dunno y.. as if i was drunk.. haha~ i would love to try again next time to walk all the way from changi to Jurong East.. siau!! *faint* haha.. siau lar! know whose da challengers? *Kerren, Wansing and Cavan*.. the 3 siau people from Brunei.. haha~ and its not so comfortable to walk with slippers =S leg so pain..

Stay at home the whole day today.. planning to finish my Business Law assignment but well i think its not possible since im now bloggin.. hehe~ but thanks god i hav done it half way ^^ i wanna watch *alone* lar!! anyone free?? teman me watch lar.. im so excited now coz i might have the chance to meet Jay Chou tomorrow! might not be upclose but still i m excited!! *yeay* please let me meet him!! hehe.. he will be in Cathay tomorrow at 6pm onwards i heard.. arh..~ cant wait to see him..hehe

Orite.. its time to get back to my assignment now.. dont really feel like playing maple story today.. hehe only played for 30mins just now.. lazy lazy!! hehe..

Nites people~ God Bless

2007-07-22T18:38:00.000+08:00

11.07.07

happy 18th birthday to me myself~

on da 10th,had great times with friends.. we went to Kuishinbo, a japanese buffet restaurant in Suntec City.. lots of food.. ^^ den we went McDonald to hav a drink..and went to the bridge near fullerton hotel..arh..counting down to my birthday! *sweet frens i have.. thanks for being there* we went kbox till 6am the next morning.. everyone was so tired on my birthday, so we din actually hav much fun on the exact day.. thanks for the cakes peeps! was surprised.. ^^ and thanks for accompany me for dinner eventho u all were damn tired..and thanks for all the presents!

thanks to those who sent me messages too..thanks for remembering my birthday!! u are always in my heart *winks* m so touched receiving a book from sista.. sis, i love u!

Thanks to Lishan and Kayln too~ i know u guys did hav a small plan for my bday but too bad the dance class cancled and u guys havin exams..its ok..i understand ^^ love u all lots! great time shoppin yesterday and sorry if i din show much smile on my face..mayb abit stress by school works.. hehe~ and sum other things.. hehe~ i know u guys miss the crazy happy little me.. hehe~ i will be back soon..dun worry.. just need sum times to charge up.. hehe~ more pics to upload when kayln send me.. ^^

2007-07-22T18:21:00.000+08:00

Blog..im back again..i guess its time to continue bloggin.. i feel better when i blog.. too much to keep inside..so stressed up!! so tired!!

The waether today is kinda good..not so sunny..took a bus to Orchard with wansing to meet her friend..shud be a happy beginning but..sumthing happened on the way.. the bus actually hit a guy.. i dunno how it happened.. it just happened so fast.. i was listening to my mp3 when suddenly i heard a big banging sound..everyone was push forward by the force..my heart started to pound very fast.. i thought the bus hit a car..but no.. it hit a man... i guess he is around his twenties.. the bus driver rushed down and see whether the guy is fine..im so scared..i peeked out..saw a man lying on the floor.. arh.. everyone was so panick inside the bus.. wansing walked nearer to see..

"u better dont look.." she told me.. i was so scare.. is it sumthing very serious? arh..i realli m scared.. the bus driver then asked all of us to get down the bus..i managed to see the guy lying on the floor..not moving..i hope he is fine..i dunno y.. i feel like crying again..why m i so weak inside?! i feel as if i hav no strength to actually walk.. i forced myself to get into another bus heading to orchard.. wansing told me that she saw no blood around..i pray for the guy..hope he will be ok! please be ok!!

life is so unpredictable.. People please appreactiate ur life.. appreciate everyone around you..you will never know whats gona happen next.. and dont put in mind the words u heard when sumone is angry..coz they always say sumting opposite of their own feeling.. there is this quote saying "you will make the best speech you will ever regret when you are angry"

After meeting Wansing's friend.. we walked around Orchard looking for a cafe to actually sit down and talk.. took us like 30mins to find empty seats in coffee bean in centerpoint.. had fun chit-chatting ^^ nice knowing you, kevin..

2007-06-02T02:09:00.000+08:00

people~ been mishing u guys lots!! mish my bloggie too~~ bad bad me for being lazy to update..*slap myself* ouch!! ahah~ sumone complaint dat she kept reading the page i wrote bout 1st may.. y never update.. nah now i update d~ hehe, thought no ppl reading ma.. thats y lazy update lor~ ^^

been doing great at MDIS.. super love the dance club there..had a performance on 26thMay, a day rite after my exam.. poor me and cardin had to struggle tru the exam.. luckily BAF is not dat difficult..but OB? man, even the name made me dizzy.. ahakz~

Its been a week since i started my 2nd term lessons.. anb both the lecturers are great! ^^ sumthing sad happened at school.. arh, dun feel like telling it again..its been haunting me back in few days ago.. but i feel better now.. i can onli pray for him~ dats life.. u will never know wats gona happen tomorow.. so cherish everyone dat u love, including me k? haha~ *blekz*

Thanks everyone for being so caring to me..esp my close frens.. byung sin oppa.. some great classmates at school..and also my dance mates! u guys r all so great~ ah.. not forgeting my lcb gang~ mr.marry had a little lamb.. i realli have great times together with my dance mates.. they r all soo great and super caring.. haha, never will i forget all the sweet moments we had, aww~ dats not gona be the last one.. haha, we have more fun moment to catch up with in the future~ and stop remindin me bout the cab k? hahaha~ taxi taxi! *blush* i was doing dat in orchard!! man, i cant believe it~ haha..

Now den SG is havin this great sales.. and im damn broke!! i spent so much man.. bought 2 tops again today.. omg!!! >.< href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_D1sT5W8WhZA/RmBjlJSfWXI/AAAAAAAAACE/CZaFJGPn95I/s1600-h/IMG_2562.JPG">

Met dem in Bugis.. da actors and actress from da lastest SG comedy horror film *gui ah gui ah*

2007-05-01T23:11:00.000+08:00

Annyong ppl~ im back for blogging..

Happy birthday to.. CarDin, Michelle and Calvin!! ><" so many ppl birthday today.. haha~ its been a happy yet tiring day today.. woke up 7.30am..den met up with michael and went to have breakfast in tiongbahru.. done our homeworks in McDonald..

Arrived at cityhall round 11.30am den went for Hotpot celebrating Cardin's brithday ^^ its a nice place there and we chatted alot~ had so much fun eating..and we are broke getting his present..but its ok la.. ^^ we r great frens~ Hang around Suntec till 4pm den we went Orchard for movie.. Spiderman3!! its nice and sad~ awww..cant blief i actually cried.. stupid eh? haha~had dinner at foodcourt and got home round 9.. such a busy day~ aww, test coming this thurs and im not ready yet~ omg!!1 must study tomorow.. hehe.. nitez ppl..im tired.. as usual i will end with some pics~

2007-04-30T22:15:00.000+08:00

ah people, im so hungry now!!! arh.. tired!! slept arpund 2am after chatting with oppa last nite..aww~ planned to go joggin at 6am but den raining..so i woke round 8+ instead.. no class in the morning so its ok.. had nice breakfast at home with wansing and june(housemate from china).

Arrived school round 11.. and had our lunch there.. oh, met Cavan at school too.. hehe ^^ we were both busy entertaining our friends.. Felt sick during class.. got abit fever i guess.. so cold in da class and i din bring my jacket along.. arh~ luckily everything bcame better after i had a honeydew~ thanks ash ^^ for treating..

Took bus from school to Orchard after class.. getting our spiderman3 tickets!! yeay, tomorrow we r gona watch da spiderman3 show!! yeapppy~ hehe..will be my 2nd time watching movie in Sg's cinema.. haha, have willy, an indonesian guy, joining us too.. so we become 6ppl gang.. haha.. After getting the tickets, we went bugis trying to reserve seats for tomorrow's party..haha, cardin's birthday party!! arh..but too bad no more seats for seoul garden.. so we had this long walk from bugis to city hall.. aww.. went to few restaurants, end up getting reservation in a chinese hotpot restaurant..seems nice tho ^^ hope everything will be fine tomolo.. gona be a great day~

After dat, we went to eat..arh..but me,oppa and wansing din eat.. haha~ regret of not eating.. we promise our landlord to get home for dinner...so yea~ we went seperate way with cardin after dat..got some surprises tomorrow~ ^^

ah ppl.. im tired..nitez

2007-04-29T22:10:00.000+08:00

hihi. im back to blog again~ since sumone nagged me to.. hehe ^^ im so tired lar.. been out the whole day today.. planned to jog dis morning but raining.. too bad~ woke up quite late..round 8.. den went to Bugis library..met up with da gangs~ had our accounting homeworks done there..den we went KFC..bcoz i wanted to eat KFC!! haha.. had such nice time there talking bout own countries..aww, i wanna go korea!!! haha~ den we went Orchard.. damn many ppl there.. hehe~ went to da cinema planning to get the tickets for spiderman3..but instead we went Starbucks again~ aww, our favourite place! hehe..

1st May.. Cardin's birthday.. yay, hotpot again~ ^^ and spiderman3 premier!! haha.. gona broke on dat day.. hav to spend so much!! haha but nvm.. once in a while.. hanging out with them are such great! love those times~ ^^ we talked bout almost everything..and we meet almost everyday eventho no class... walau~ haha..

OMG!~ BAF test soon~~ yah, goodluck everyone!! hehe.. gona start studying smart now..or i tot i already started? hehe~ blekz~ ^^ lov goin to library

Here come some pics b4 i leave.. gona sleep early tonite coz plan to jog tomorrow morning..pls, dont rain!! hehe.. got class tomorrow afternun..will go to school early for some self revision.. 4 more days to BAF test..omg!!!

Ah..one thing.. i bought Tvxq's 5 in the black , japanese album!! hehe so happy~ ^^ oppa promised to get me some cds when he is back to korea.. pray hard he dont forget wat he said.. haha~ and i bought a basketball today..yes, finally i can play in da park nearby.. ahaha..i can play tomorrow morning..cant wait d~ ok ppl.. im sleepy~ nitez!! let the page be flooded by some cool pics~ ^^

In da Mrt station..

Can you believe dat everyone is staring at us.. haha~ so wat? XD

Pinkies in Seoul Garden~ Dj, Cardin, Kerren, Wansing

Adidas..love this shoe.. mine is orange!! ^^

Studyin in starbucks.. we are serious ok? haha~

Cute Dongseng + Byung sin oppa during OB lesson.. omg!! we actually took dis while lecturer was talking infront..haha~ good students!!

Nitez ppl..muacks~

2007-04-27T21:30:00.000+08:00

Life in Singapore..

Its been almost 3 weeks? i miss brunei.. hehe..

I was struggling so badly the 1st week here.. miss everyone in brunei so much~ get even moodier when i couldnt get a nice place to stay.. the 1st house i viewed, the auntie too macam d and the place kinda messy too..then 2nd place? dun b surprised, the owner is a single indian man.. walau!!! *faint*.. viewed few more places, also not good.. arh..got so fed up..actually planned to stay at ws's relative place, who knows last minit the agent called askin if we wanna view a house in redhill.. so we gave it a try..

1st impression, pretty nice.. big enough, furniture provided, decorations r modern and nice, not messy, owner quite friendly and rental fee also reasonable..so tunggu apa lagi? terus la we signed contract.. haha, at 1st i scare i would make the wrong decision..but its been a week here.. arh, living together isnt tat hard.. everything is goin fine now.. getting to it.. the bus, the mrt, the distance of walking, rushing for shuttle bus.. haha~ everything is so smooth now.. realli have to thanks god for giving us the chance to get this room..

now talking bout MDIS,

am kinda used to system now.. love it.. we have so much freedom man..can even sleep during OB class, opps!! i dont do dat..but many do~ hehe.. esp my byung sin oppa!! there are 40plus in our class i guess.. half of them are from china, then i have got classmates from indonesia, mongolia, vietnam, nilgeria and korea not forgetting singaporeans too. Everyone is so friendly there..

1st few lessons, its always me and wansing sticking together.. but after a week, we found some great frens.. DJ from China, Cardin from Vietnam and Michael from Korea.. Ahh, they are all gentleman.. haha~ all brothers.. older than me and wansing.. XD all oppa-s and one byung sin oppa.. haha~ we always hang out together.. Starbucks, bugis library, school canteen and shopping.. arh hotpot restaurant too! ahaha, i can never imagine that im close with them.. Wansing too never think of that.. ok, here come some pics we took..

Wansing and Kerren in starbucks~

Cardin and Kerren in starbucks.. pink day~

Seoul Garden!!! ^^ Yummy.. Pinky and Blue boss~

Awww people, im tired now.. i will just stop here.. will be back tomolo~ ^^ nitez~

2007-04-09T17:18:00.002+08:00

7th April,

Life is never easy when u r alone..

I dunno y but i juz woke up at 6am.. turning to my side, i found dat wansing wasnt there.. den i noticed she moved to the floor.. suppose tat the fan cant reach her place so she moved down.. i suppose to shut my eyes since its abit too early.. when i shut my eyes, scenes of my frens sending me off played in my mind.. i tried not to think..but i just couldnt control myself.. i couldnt stand it anymore.. i took out my phone and read all the msgs they sent me b4 i leave.. every single msgs made me cried.. thanks everyone.. i know i should be strong here.. i will try my best.. i just cant stop myself missing u guys.. i hope the same thing wont happen tomolo morning.. i know u guys wont want to know dat im crying myself to sleep early in the morning.. i wil be strong! yes, i will!

The thing dat i regret most b4 i leave is the frenship status between me and few guys in tutong.. guys, i duno wats the reason dat made u run away from me.. but i just wanna say thanks for once being my bestfrens.. i gave us many chances to glue back together.. but seems like the plan never work.. there is still a hole between our frenship.. i never tot this will hapen to us.. but seems like we couldnt turn back time.. like wat u guys always say, this shud we the last chance sleeping over, last chance eating together, last chance walking on the streets together, last chance taking pics together, last chance limteh-ing.. i never know dat all these words would come true a month b4 i leave Brunei.. but still im glad dat i was once treated as ur bestfren too.. thanks.. maybe u guys feel better this way.. at least being a stranger is better than enermy.. whenver i think bout u guys, i felt realli sad.. there is always a hole in my heart telling me bout or frenship.. but i will never forget all those sweet memories we had together b4.. at least we did share those time b4.. i know im no longer sumone to u guys..but i dun mind.. as long as u feel better without me..den forget me, if it makes u happier.. i will try my best to keep oni the sweet memories of u guys.. smile, coz im finally out of ur sight!

-to be continued..

its 5.20pm here in Singapore and im in MDIS's canteen.. hehe.. today is my 1st day here.. pretty fun la the class.. talk more again in my nex post.. wansing is sitting beside me now.. smiling at the screen.. haha, she juz loves the OB's lecturer so much!! opps~ hahaha

2007-04-09T17:18:00.001+08:00

6th April

arh..time relly flies..

im now sitting in the living room of wansing's relative house. Casting my mind back to yesterday.. the day i left Brunei..arh, im so sad.. i mish brunei so much.. mish my family and frens..and my room too!! mish my desktop.. mish my sista.. how am i suppose to live my life here in brunei? arh.. it was realli hard to say goodbye.. man, now then i notice how much i love Brunei.. thanks to those who sent us off.. I LOVE YEW!! and I MISH YEW!! i told myself not to cry when but i couldnt hold back tears.. especially when i gave everyone a last hug.. eww, i feel tears in my eyes now.. shud i not think back? hehe.. i will try to cheer myself up by saying we sure will meet again in the future.. i hope soon.

thanks for all the presents and letters. Eww, u guys wrote me letters, trying to make me cry issit? ahah, and guess wat? u did it.. coz i realli cried reading all the letters.. so touching eventho u guys trying to make it sound a bit happy.. thanks a lot ppl.. muacks!

Special thanks to..

Papa - pa, i love u lots!! eventho i know u wont be reading this but still i need to thank you. i cant tell u face to face coz i know i sure will cry.. im realli glad to be ur daughter.. faith brings us together.. i love u pa.. and do take care of urself!

Koko- arh ko ah, must be good boy.. help papa everyday oh.. and do talk to him lots.. eventho he might be abit lo-so sumtimes.. but its all for our own good.. hehe, and dun worry too much bout me here.. i will success here as *s.h.e* haha~ so next time when im back in Brunei..many ppl will wait for me in the airport..queu-ing for my autograph.. haha, apakan~ love u ko.. and i know i will be ur trolley, helping u to get stuffs from here and kirim back to Brunei.. haha.. nvm as long as papa supply me with money.. winks! take care owez..

Sista- SISTA!!! I LOVE YEW!! haha, u said u wont cry yesterday ah..but then u end up using all the tissues.. haha~ i know u can live without me one..but ur life will be better with me nia.. coz i m ur sunshine..and u r my moon.. we both need each other.. i love u, i love u.. as much as *he* loves u.. even more den his love ah.. haha~ opps! mish u sleeping over, mish ur laughter, mish ur cooking, mish hanging out with u, mish makan-ing with u, mish listenin to u singin timeless, mish all the seconds i spent with u.. mish u to the max!! haha.. do take care of urself and ur family k? hehe.. diet diet!! how i wish i can attend ur koko's wedding too..ish.. u must be looking good in gown. ofcoz la, my sista kali ah.. haha~ take care of *mei you ming* too, u know he can be a goodboi.. hehe.. thanks for everything sista.. i know my handwriting in the tension's cd looks like singer's writing.. ahha.. apakan? bet u crying reading it eh? or u din? haha.. take care owes.. muacks! u know u r always in my heart..

Chee Boon- hmm, eventho u might not be reading my blog but i just wanna tell u how much i mish u.. mish callin u sibut la.. SIBUT.. haha~ love u lots man.. u know u r important to me.. and i know i stand a place in ur heart too..thanks for all the msgs, miscals and the letter.. hehe, i know u trying to make urself sound happy in the letter but tell u wat.. im half crying half laughin reading it.. apakan c12 eh? hahaa~ i mish c11 lar.. dun ever say i [used to] be ur best gal fren coz i will always be ur best gal fren..now and forever.. mish u sending me home too.. hehe~ the guy who ran away himself coz he heard a ghost story i told him bout my house.. alah, apani? so lousy one.. hehe~ mish talkin to u la sibut! hehe~ be strong and live happily.. u can always count on me lar.. micky bun! hehe~ muacks

Elza- hey blue gal, i mish u.. i mish u! hehe thanks for everything..u r such a great fren.. u cheer me up whenver im down and u pull me up when i fall.. i shall nvr forget the moment we spent together.. all the laughters we shared.. love u guys lots.. thanks for being there when im in need of sumone to talk to.. haha, we gossiped alot lar.. haha~ but who care? hehe thanks for everything gal.. if u think u can, u can.. yes i can!! enjoy urself in smso yea.. hehe.. i love u more than max do.. *bleks* im sure blackie will miss u lar.. esp ur footsteppins callin siewlin.. haha~ *siewwwllliiinnn* aww man, im so self love.. feel weird typing my own name here.. haha~

Nekmahtul- hehe.. micky is more handsome den uknow can? bleh~ thanks for ur letter.. so touching eventho its short.. haha~ mish my house eh? i miss u lar..miss dancin together too.. aiks.. hope we still hav the chance nex time.. yes, we sure have.. keep in touch ya baby.. hehe, good luck for ur scholarship thingy too~ anyway lov the cool pics we took in season.. dats a great memory.. hehe slimming belt mu pasang dah? mine is off from a few days b4 i left brunei till now lar.. dunno who can switch it on for me here in sg.. arh~ mish u all lar..

Vivi- arh, i din notice the letter until last nite when i unpack some stuffs.. man, so long lagi tu.. ber-taip lagi tu.. haha thanks gal.. i know u sure smiling when reading ur name here.. or r u crying? eh, dun cry bah.. if u cry, i wil cry too.. i love u!! haha, yes u r someone to me!! and glad to know tat u love being with me.. i lov to hav u with us too!! sumtimes i do feel bad as if i rampas u from *ur bestfren* so i kinda takut to call u join us sumtimes.. but den i still give a try.. thanks god u feel good with us too.. hehe~ ofcoz take pic 4 of us lar.. we se-gang kali ah~ hehe bolih?? issit me the one pullin u to us? but nek n elza gave u warm welcome to join us too.. hehe~ i felt so one together with u guys man..love u lots! i know u r my blog's fren.. so i promise i will update my bloggie frequently..arh, just dat i have no internet access here.. so abit difficult sumtimes.. but i will try my best.. love u vv!! haha~ eww, u din mention bout slimming belt in ur letter la..how can u forget bout it? hehe

Mayyer- hey gal, im really touched dat u sent me off.. i promise to come back soon.. coz i lov u!! haha~ eventho u lov sumone more.. apakan? blekz~ hehe am realli surprise dat u cried b4 i leave, u inda sampai hati [cant think of the english word.. haha] i go.. like i never tot u wil be sad to know the absence of siewlin in tutong for 3 years.. man, im so touched u see.. haha i lov u lar.. thanks for everything mayyer.. u treat me as a real fren.. i know im a pretty good negative thinker..but not after the day i left brunei.. i finally notice everyone love my presence.. hehe i finally know dat u all love me..thanks!! i love u all lots~ take care owez.. and dun forget to brush ur teeth k? coz u know.. with all those basi there in ur teeth..krg food stuck..den toothdecay tia.. hehe~ carrot runs away!!

-to be continued

sorry to continue so late.. hehe, been busy settling down and now finally done~ ^^

my thanks to list..

SiewChieh- Thanks for telling me watever u feel on da last day b4 i leave.. hehe~ glad that we are close again~ remember to update ur stuffs recently to me eh? if not i outdated ni..

Ratz-..arh, bak kut teh!! i mish yew~ arh, reading back the msg u sent me b4 i left brunei..so touching and long.. i inda sampai hati to delete it lar.. thanks for being so nice to me..and yes, its a must to hang out again when im back to brunei.. ^^ mish mall lar.. u did nothing wrong to me, be happy owez k? promise me to study smart.. hehe, u and bagua.. my best juniors forever!! mish u lots~ take care..and if u have any probs dun scare to share with me k? i oledi know some of ur secrets from bagua.. opps~ haha..

BaGuaChing- thanks for being such a nicce junior to me~ jay rocks!! hehe ^^ mish hanging out with u lar.. and mish gambling too.. opps~ haha! and i know u mish me too.. been waiting for ages for my update here? paiseh la.. u know ur senior here very lazy one..but i promise to blog as often as possible since now i got wireless at home d.. arh, when u come singapore, remember to find me k? i will bring u to chill out~ if im free.. but i think i will be free lar.. hehe~ mish u lots! thanks for the micky's ring.. hehe

Reamie- Thanks for being a nice fren..ahah, and i know u r such a big fans of my blog eh? haha, i miss brunei lar.. miss easyway and wywy..can kirim to me? apakan~ ^^ take care owez ya~ i will be fine here..

arh.. my mind so blank now.. dunno who to thank.. but everyone..i miss u all~ ^^ i mish brunei!!

2007-03-31T23:50:00.000+08:00

Its true wat ppl say.. u will only know how important it is to you when u r leaving the place/the thing/ or tat person.. i started to mish Brunei now..mish everyone in Brunei.. mish every single minutes i spent in Brunei.. To everyone who knows me out there.. i love u all, i mean it! i treasure every moment dat we spent.. we had so much fun together.. laugh and cry.. angry and sad.. everything dat we came across together..i shall never forget.. eventho we might not be able to contact tat often but remember watever dat will happen in the future will never replace ur place in my heart.. never! all the memories are irreplaceable~

Counting down.. 6 days left? arh.. never tot its so soon.. man, i cried alot today.. i wonder wat will hapen on friday? like wat Ratz and BaGua said.. mayb will banjir kali haha~ met out with a 'kinda' important person to me.. haha not kinda la.. its is~ haha~ had great time lunch-ing, lepak-ing and talk-ing.. u owe me this.. dun u ever forget.. hehe, and i love the earring dat i bought.. its like uknow's haha, i took one and sumone took the other one.. hehe~ ^^ love it so much man.. Thanks angela and angelina *ehemz, angel sisters eh?* for selling those stuffs.. Brunei will soon b flooded with Tvxq's fans arh~ hehe..

Went to Angelina's shop.. wanted to buy Version D arh..so disapointed when i know sumone bought it few hours b4 i went there so i juz bought earings instead. I kept thinking which lucky gal bought dat version D arh.. eww~ but guess wat? its My lovely sista yg bali for me.. damn touched when she gave me.. thanks sista.. i love u!! we r soulmates~ and thanks mummy and sista's sisters for the me2u big bear~ love it so much..im for sure i will bring it with me to singapore~

Hmm, went for high-tea with sci united cuties and sir hafiz.. thanks for the treat sir.. and thanks for the teaching ^^ had so much fun laughin.. was abit crazy dat time.. kept laughin with frens oni..makin lame jokes.. but end up crying.. arh when they played the tagalog song..its so sad..and tears started to fill my eyes when gkah 1st came over to hug me.. man, its not the last day we gona meet but i juz cant hold back tears.. i tried to.. but cant..~ i have tried so hard to hold back tears.. but i started to cry when i hug everyone.. man, i love u all la.. all the sweet memories we had in sufri..i will never forget! bcoz of u all.. i live my life happily there in sufri.. thanks~ arh.. dats the reason y i went off so fast after getting our from the lift..coz i scare i will continue crying.. so i ran away with a fren.. sorry mates.. i din mean it.. but i know i wont be able to control my tears if i was there with u all in the lobby.. i love u all lots! u hav lighten up my life~ and u too sista.. love u love u!

Hang out with frens at kbox, arh tats y i feel as if sore throat now.. had fun shouting n screamin at the kbox haha.. anyway, seeing tvxq at angela's shop cheered me up so i was able to hold my tears.. and sumone told me not to cry too.. hehe~ not friday yet wat? apakan.. haha~ frens, i had fun with u all at mall today.. thanks for everything and thanks u there!! ^^

Bibi, thanks for wearing the 'gal-like' shirt dat i bought u.. hehe~ am glad dat u actually wore it.. regret dat we din take photo.. regret for not running to u juz now.. but thanks for tellin me everything.. im glad to have u as a fren~ love u lots!! u know i will always be there for u~ trust me, u r a great guy to me.. ^^ goodluck in everything u do wor..

pynic onnie..hwaiting!! u know wat i mean.. hehe~ Mr.Bean was kinda funny.. but some part abit bored lor.. but had fun with koko and all the jie jies lar~ hehe thanks for temaning me for the movie.. hehe~ ^^

arh ppl..my eyes so pain now.. bakas nangis.. ish~ love u all lots! and nitez~ ^^ no good to stay up late leh..and angela, take care wor! Ratz and Bagua, i love u 2.. my tuesday is book by u 2.. how many hours arh? aku ni mahal wah.. haha~

Vivi, Elza and Nek.. arh Mayyer too.. better get ready with ur specs lar.. friday is coming soon.. haha~ love u all.. tvxq hwaiting! anyway m goin miri tomolo will be back on monday.. mish ya all lots!

2007-03-30T22:47:00.000+08:00

sorry ppl for not being able to update myself here.. been busy doin my kl report till late nite last 2 days.. aww~ im a last minute student.. yea i admit it~

Anyway been havin great times this few days.. u can always see me in basketball court this few evenings.. ehemz, semangat bolih? nah, juz feel like sweating..its like a habit..when u sweat this day den u will wan to sweat everyday..so yea~

Hmm, yesterday went to Sufri for this prize presentation thingy..and guess wat? the guest of honour is my fren's dad.. ehemz, im proud lar.. watever~ haha sotz.. m happy to meet all my teachers again and ofcoz my juniors.. not forgetting my classmates too..love u guys lots lar~ and Mayyer.. im touched dat u r actually cryin bcoz im gona leave soon.. man, i never expect this.. i dunno dat u love me so much.. more den loving si tut ah.. haha~ Blekz.. i realli gona mish u la.. mish everyone!! M finally not broke anymore.. haha~ got money from school as reward for our result.. thankz ya~ and thankz tcher ummi.. im mishing u teacher.. i mish poa lots!!

Had this long chat with Dorren ysterday at my house.. wow~ we realli mished out lots.. haha~ so we were busy catching up each other's story..and im glad dat she is happy in JIS now.. guess she made the rite decision.. hehe ^^ the future bioengineer~

Had sista sleeping over last nite.. pretty fun.. we both slept at 2am den woke up at 8am this morning.. man, how am i suppose to live in SG without u sista? haha~ i feel so glad to have u bside me.. aww.. gona mish u like hell lar.. we had so much fun together.. makan? minum? ice cream? movies? gossip? haha~ many many more.. joongie has got this 'SOUL' tattoo and chunnie has this 'MATE' tattoo..and they both made up 'SOULMATE' juz like us.. yeon+lin = soulmate too~ wat a coincidence.. hehe~ youngyoung~ hehe..

Rite, talkin bout today.. had mayyer over my place round 8.30am so yea she woke us up!! ehemz.. haha no la..thanks for waking us up too coz liyeon had to go at 9am =) den Vv, Elza and Nek came too.. as usual we chatted everything.. arh esp mengumpat!! haha~ we love doing dat.. arh n hope this is not the last day for us to do so.. hehe pls say NO!! i realli love those feelings when i m with u guys.. its just so relax dat i can say n do anything.. love u all lots! my best classmates~~

Went to Express for primary reunion.. hm, its pretty awkward.. i dunno how to say but.. dun realli like it lar..~ as if we r not together one.. weird tho.. but who cares la.. at least many did show up.. so went to yeon's place for karaoke after dat..and i know dat vv and elza are touched by my song.. *blush* cam banar.. haha~ had a great time there lar..

Sumone finally miscal me today.. how dare u not miscal me for 2 days.. haha nvm i know u no credit liaw.. XD i also low credit.. arh~ im leavin brunei in 7 days or less now~ omo..time realli flies lar.. and tomolo m gona hangout the whole day in Gdg.. yes!! haha~ happy =P hope will hav fun in season with classmates lor~ m realli lookin forward to it..

arh ppl.. im sleepy.. nitez~ Tvxq hwaiting!! and who is readin now.. smile pls~ hehe~ ^^ i love u all esp Micky!! ahah~

2007-03-26T22:46:00.000+08:00

Bloggie..here i come again~ ^^ arh, sume complaint dat my post is a lil too long..aiya sorry la.. i talkative can? or shud i say typactive? haha apakan? no such word..

orite talking bout yesterday.. omo, we woke up round 11+ am..both me and yeon bcoz of a call from my cousin in miri.. haha~ and Wansing actually woke round 9+ i suppose..so keng la.. was damn tired the whole day yesterday.. slept at 4am.. what to do? arh~ but sumone even worse lor.. 5am still can miscal me.. din sleep the whole nite..aiya~

Went to PizzaHut with Nek, Vv, Mayyer and Elza~ man, mish hanging out with u guys lar.. counting my fingers.. hmm 10more days to go? aww~ gona mish u all lots!! everyone!! we chatted everything..updating all our stories.. hehe~ gosiping as usual ^^ oni one thing we all forgotten to do.. take pics lar.. =.=! do hope we hav chance to meet agian b4 i leave lar.. gona take tonnes of pic with u guys g..

Meeting up with aizat -a guy from KIGS- at basketball court..arh, shud hav met him in DQ instead supaya he lanja me ice cream.. edeh, rosak plan! haha~ dats wat he owez say.. ^^ thanks for the cd arh eventho sikit ja my pics and banyak ur innocent looks~ ahaha~ kinda regret not taking much pics during dat KIGS challange back in a year.. wow~ time realli flies.. its been a year d.. anyway Aizat realli looks like chinese.. and he admit dat 90% tot he is a chinese.. haha~

umm, was feeling abit down yesterday.. i mean i actually went to basketball court plannin to play basketball but turn out goin to dq with ivor..den sumting came up so i cancled my idea of playing basketball.. feel abit guilty since souwei them were all in the court bcoz i asked them to play but end up i din play.. sorry people... on the way home i felt so damn unhappy.. arh, im owez like this.. feel like crying but m happy dat i was able to hold back tears.. arh, i promise myself to live happily so why shud i b sad over this small things rite? ^^ luckily i din cry.. heeh~ feel kinda stupid when i think back..

Luckily someone chatted with me and made me smile.. whose dat sumone? haha, the person dat miscal me at 5am lar~ hehe! i seems to be bring bad luck lar to dat person lar.. sorry if i do~ =) but dun stay away from me k? u promise u will never forget me one.. u dare to.. i'll kick u ah.. hehe~ bad me.. *grins* do take care of urself when i leave k? and watch ur steps when u walk lar.. this time fall from stairs next time masuk longkang baru u know.. *blekz* stop makin me worry bout u leh..

Went to Bandar this afternun with daddy n koko~ felt kinda sad at 1st coz daddy dun wanna accompany me for MR Bean's holiday.. arh~ i wanna watch lar.. Aww, my mood got worst when i hav to re-do some of dady's stuffs.. felt abit stress.. in 10 days i hav to finish my daddy's stuffs and my Kl report.. man.. not forgetin my x tcher's stuff.. arh..not 10 days.. shud be less coz my weekends r fully booked~ busy me.. Luckily koko bring me to swensen lor... feeling better after eating icecream..arh, i hav been mishing icecream since dat sumone owez mention icecream to me.. haha~ anyway its realli a wonderful time with koko n dady at bandar juz now.. its not like we always go out together..so i kinda appreciate it! =)

Chee brought back me 2 letters.. i tot its from Pucko, a fren from Norway.. but not.. instead its from 2 of my malaysia frens.. man, im so surprise to get those letters.. thanks.. esp u, pynic onnie.. love u lots! thanks for dos micky's stickers..eventho i din go to the concert but i feel so lucky to get them from u.. arh love u lots!! ^^

Did some packing up juz now.. half way done.. hehe! issit abit too early to do dat? i juz tot i shud do it when im free..coz u know la..im very lazy one.. den last minute packing will make everything goes the other way round.. haha~ daddy said i better pack early.. ^^

Am feeling good today.. has this sumone msg n miscal me the whole day.. haha~ thanks for being there.. ^^ and im also happy dat i din lost the frenship dat i fear of losing earlier.. haha~ ^^ thanks too.. y is everything getting good now? thanks god!

U know im always there for u.. so dun bother to text me when u r down.. ^^ i will owez be there to listen and see u cry *bad me* i mean to comfort u lar.. haha~ hav a nice day ppl.. Tvxq hwaiting!